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Wep Ronpet 2019 Epagomenal Days Rubrics

As part of my year of rites, I was told that I needed to do “proper rites” for Wep Ronpet. O left the details vague, but I think that’s because he knows that I already know what I consider to be “proper rites” for Wep Ronpet, and so he’s essentially holding me to my own standard. So while I would love to skip out on so much stuff and only do something on the day of Wep Ronpet, I already know he won’t let me.

So without further ado, here is my schedule for Wep Ronpet this year:

  • July 28: Propitiation rites
  • July 29: Rites to Osiris
  • July 30: Rites to Heru Wer
  • July 31: Monthly Ma’at rites and rites to Set
  • Aug 1: Rites to Aset
  • Aug 2: Rites to Nebhet
  • Aug 3: Wep Ronpet rites including execrations

For the propitiation rites, I will be using a copy of the current propitiation rites that we’re using with a few nods to it being the end of the year mixed in. The rubrics for the epag days are below. For whatever reason, I felt inclined to make these rubrics purely from my dome instead of scouring the CT for material to build around. I don’t know if its because I know I couldn’t concentrate enough to read the CT right now, or if its something else, but if the cadence (and length, tbh) seems different to you, that’s probably why.

For the day of Wep Ronpet itself, I’m going to be reusing the rubric from 2019’s new year rites. It’s a little bit lazy, but writing rubrics takes time, and time is not something I’ve had a lot of. I think that moving forward, it may behoove me to make a ritual for each year that works for both the civil and the Kemetic new year, so that way I can double up on the heka that the ritual contains while also saving myself some time.


Rites to Osiris

We are in the time between times
The place where vast, endless potential lives.
This is the place where you came into being.
Where all beings came into being.

Feel the potential touching your skin.
Feel the opportunities spread out before you.
As Sirius rises into the sky for the first time of this first time,
Allow yourself to be as free as you truly are.
Free to plant your roots where you see fit.
Free to rise up and claim what is yours.

Feel the nourishing exudations that seep into you.
Feel them change you, encourage you, push you towards growth.
Unfurl yourself towards the sun.
Reach up towards what reaches down towards you.

[Open shrine]

Stand up, rise up.
Grow like what comes forth from you.
Feel the kiss of Re upon your skin.
Feel the warmth of the Iyrt Re upon your brow.
Reach your arms towards the sky and seek their embrace.

Presentation of Light

As the sun shines across the Two Lands, bringing forth new life,
So too does the light shine throughout all of your shrines.
Bull of the West, see the light that glows in your shrine.
Feel its warmth awaken your sight.
Take this perfect offering to your self and become Whole through it.
Allow the healing warmth of Amun-Re into your eyes,
Whole and pure as the Eye of Horus.

Presentation of Water

I give you sustenance as the sun gives you sustenance.
As Hapy gives the flood that washes over the land,
Cleansing everything that it touches,
Restoring the balance after months of drought.
I give you this water that fills your cup and restores the fertile lands of your heart and soul.

Drink of it and be as renewed as the Two Lands.
Take this primordial water to yourself and be restored.
Revel in the cool taste of water as it nourishes your body.

Presentation of Food

O Ba Among the Akhs, feel the glowing sustenance that Re freely gives to you daily.
Feel its warmth settle into your skin and rejuvenate your bones.
Just as Sothis prepares these yearly offerings for you in her name of year,
So too have I prepared these yearly divinities in your name.
Come to your table and sit.
Be present with me and accept this sustenance that I have brought for you.
For I know you and I know your needs.
Allow me to attend to you as your son does.

Presentation of Ma’at

I present ma’at to you, O Lord of Ma’at.
Take her to your nose and breathe in her scent.
Allow her presence to sate you, to rejuvenate you.
Be with her until you are One.
Feel her presence within your heart,
Hear her guidance in your ears,
Feel her directions in your limbs.
Live your life in totality with her.

Take this Ma’at to your breast, O Lord.
Allow her into your presence forever and always.
Take her to you, and renew your youth in peace.

O Great God, feel your roots taking hold, your growth being impressive.
See the glory of what you have become, harnessing all of the potential in your path.
Feel the divinity of your unity with your balance.
Feel the stability that you exude.

Reversion of Offerings

O Lord of Abydos, the time of strife is gone, balance is restored,
And you are sated and firm upon your seat.
Your enemies withdraw from your presence, in all of your places
And your offerings are reverted to your servants
So that the cycle of reciprocity may continue on.


Rites to Heru-Wer

O Divine Falcon, whose plumage is matched by none.
Here me now with both of your ears,
See me with both of your eyes and come to me.
I have traversed the sky, I have divided the firmament,
I have followed the path of Kephri to be here with you,
Do not impede me upon your path.

We are in the time between times
The place where vast, endless potential lives.
This is the place where you came into being.
Where all beings came into being.
Meet me here on the cusp of the first time of this first time,
So that you may renew your youth and your beauty in peace.

[Open shrine]

O you of the horizons, who knows the ways of the Sun god
I have come today to revitalize you, to rejoice in your splendor
To attend to you and resound your glories.

Presentation of Light

I strike the flint to light the way ahead for you, O Lord of Knives.
I strike the flint to ensure that there is always a light shining in your shrines.
I strike the flint that brings the fire that drives away the enemies of the Two Lands
I strike the flint so that there will always be light to see the way.

Come to this light, O Beneficent God,
Take it to yourself, allow its glow to warm your limbs.
Come to this light, O Lord of Power,
Take it to yourself, feel its renewing power become one with you.
Come to this light and renew your youth in peace.

Presentation of Water

The yearly primordial water washes over the Two Lands restoring all that it touches.
The yearly primordial water washes over the Two Lands until only the horizons remain.
See here, see that I have traversed far across the Two Lands
And gathered this water to offer to my Lord.

Take this water to you, drink of it and be as renewed as the Two Lands.
Let it part your lips and quench your thirst.
Take this primordial water to yourself and be restored.
Allow it to permeate your body and rejuvenate you in every place you reside.

Presentation of Food

O Provider, let me provide for you as your provide for others,
As Hathor nourishes those who follow the NTRW.
Come to these provisions that I have crafted for you.
Great is your majesty when your heart is full with the purity of the eye of Horus.
Take this eye of Horus to yourself, partake of it, and be restored
Great is your majesty when the light of the eye of Horus radiates through you, glorious and complete.

Presentation of Ma’at

I present to you this Ma’at, O Great Lord.
Take this Ma’at to you, take her to your breast.
She takes up residence within you, she sits firmly upon her seat.
Allow her into your self, allow her to become one with you,
For you truly are one with Ma’at, you Lord of Ma’at.

O you god who shines brighter than Re himself,
Your plumage radiates the beauty and glory of Ma’at.
Her presence is ever enduring within you.
Take Ma’at to you daily as Re does
So that you may be enduring for ever and ever.

Reversion of Offerings

You are sated, O you brightest of the NTRW.
Your enemies are truly defeated and exist no more.
Ma’at has been restored to you, and you are firm upon your seat.
These your offerings are reverted to your servants,
So that they may continue to serve you, glorious and complete.


Rites to Set

Hear me, O you Lord of Thunder.
Hear me with both of you ears and listen to the words coming from my mouth.
Allow my words to draw you near to me in this space.
This space that balances between the old and new,
This time between times
The place where vast, endless possibility lives.
This is the place where you came into being.
Where all beings came into being.

Join me here in this space that embodies Ma’at.
Balanced between the old and the new,
But only momentarily before being ushered into the new year.
For every moment is changing, and nothing is forever constant .
Join me here you Lord of change.

[Open the shrine]

O you dread initiator who knows the ins and outs of constant change,
Come to me now so that I may bring Ma’at to you,
So that you will enter the new year refreshed,
Glorious and complete.

Presentation of Light

As the light rises in the east, so too does light rise in your shrines, in all of their places.
Come to this light, allow it to wash over you and rejuvenate your body.
Take this light to you, partake of this eye of Horus, whole and complete.
Take this eye of Horus to you, become renewed with vigor from its presence.

Truly, there shall always be a light shining for you
In each of your shrines in all of their places.
Truly, your name shall forever be enduring,
So long as the sun crosses the sky.

Presentation of Water

I present to you cool primordial water,
Take this water to you, take it to your lips and be refreshed by it.
The water runs over your temples, your shrines, your body,
And in so doing, all are refreshed, renewed and restored.

Take this water to you daily into the coming year
As Re takes Ma’at to himself daily.
Take this primordial water to yourself and be restored.
Allow it to permeate your body and rejuvenate you in every place you reside.

Presentation of Food

I bring these food offerings to you, Lord of the Storm.
See, they are the foes of the Two Lands, bound and set to the fire.
Come to these your offerings. May their scent fill you with hunger.
Be present with me and accept this sustenance that I have brought for you
Take these offerings to you and restore your body with them.
Take these offerings and renew your youth in peace.

Presentation of Ma’at

I have brought Ma’at to you, O god of glory.
I have brought Ma’at to you so that she may brighten your face.
Take this Ma’at to you, O Lord of Ma’at.
Take her to you and allow her to rest within your heart.
Take her to you and allow her seat to become firm.
Take her to you and allow her guidance to permeate your actions.
Take this Ma’at to you, and become whole and new like Zep Tepi.

Feel Ma’at as she resides within you.
Feel feel the joy that her presence brings to your life.
Hear the music that she sings within your heart.
Remember the joy and vibrancy of experiencing the whole.
Take Ma’at to you in her entirety, and exact the change that her judgement requires.

Reversion of Offerings

O Lord of the Desert, your enemies have withdrawn from you,
And all is restored to Ma’at throughout the Two Lands.
Your thirst is quenched, your stomach is full and you are firm upon your seat.
These your offerings revert to your servants
For as I live, you live, and as you live, I live.


Rites to Aset

O you lady of Gold,
I come to you, I ask to be in your presence.
I kneel before you, for your glory is unparalleled and well-known throughout the entirety of the Two Lands.
You have persevered and triumphed against great odds,
You have loved, lost, and regained in all of the majesty that is yours.
Come to me now, in this time between times
The place where vast, endless potential lives.
This is the place where you came into being.
Where all beings came into being.

I come to you, O Lady of Gold. Do not repulse me on your path.
Allow me into your presence, allow me close to you
So that I may extol your beauty and give you greatness
As we move into the new year.

[Open shrine]

Come to me, you defender of Re.
Come to me here so that I may give you these divinities.
So that you may enter the new year
Bright and with glory upon your brow.

Presentation of Light

O you who brought the bright light of Horus into the world,
Feel this light as it enters your shrine.
By the work of your hands, the Eye of Horus is strong throughout the Two Lands
Relish in your victories and bask in the light provided by your son.

This light shines throughout the Two Lands,
it vanquishes all of your enemies in all of their places.
This light shines for you for all eternity.
Truly, its light brightens your ka.
I bring you this light and place it at your feet
So that you may renew your youth in peace.

Presentation of Water

I bring to you this primordial water which has come forth from the Two Caverns.
The sweetest water in all the land, it brings brilliance your ka to drink of it.
Come to these cool waters that nourish you.
Take it to your lips and be quenched as the Two Lands is when the river floods yearly.
Feel the greenness of your heart growing when you take the waters to you
Feel the joy as it expands in your heart.

Presentation of Food

I am Hathor, the lady of nourishment,
And I have gathered the choicest items from all of the lands to offer to my mistress.
See, I have brought you these provisions for your subsistence.
Sit firmly upon your seat and take these offerings to yourself and be sated.
They will nourish your body and sustain you into the new year.

Presentation of Ma’at

I place this Ma’at before you.
She takes up seat in all of your shrines in all of their places.
Reunite with this Ma’at, O Lady of Ma’at.
For you are truly one, and as she lives, you live.

Ma’at’s scent permeates your residence.
Her perfume fills your nose and the air is weighty with her presence and exuberance.
Be one with Ma’at, take her to your breast.
Bring all of the guidance and virtue of Ma’at with you into the upcoming year.

Reversion of Offerings

O shining goddess, your enemies have withdrawn from you, and balance has been restored throughout the Two Lands.
You have returned victorious and complete, shining upon your seat.
You have taken the eye of Horus to you in its name of reversion of offerings.
Your offerings now revert back to your servants,
So that the cycle of giving between us shall never be broken.


Rites to Nebhet

I call out to you O Goddess of the West.
All shining in gold, your radiance is known throughout the Two Lands.
Mistress of Ma’at, hear my words with both of your ears.
May my words please you and bring you near to me,
So that we may celebrate this last day before the first Zep Tepi of the new year.

We are at the end of the time between times
The place where vast, endless potential lives.
This is the place where you came into being.
Where all beings came into being.
Let us gather up this potential from this place,
Gather it with our arms and carry it forward with us
As we cross the threshold into the new year.

[Open shrine]

I come to you beautiful goddess, do not repulse me upon your path.
I have come to you so that I may present to you these divinities,
To sing of your praises and resound your glories.
So that you may be well-equipped as we move into the new year.

Presentation of Light

The light comes forth, radiating from the east every morning.
It’s radiance is only dimmed by your brilliance, you Lady of the house.
I give you this light, O Protector, take it to you.
It’s rays wash over your body, restoring you.
Bask in these rays, feel their warmth on your skin.
Feel it sinking into your limbs, making you renewed and whole.
Take this eye of Horus to your countenance, glorious and complete.

Presentation of Water

The waters of the Two Caverns have started to wash over the land,
Covering it in renewal, fertility and growth.
I have gathered this refreshing water for my Mistress.
I bring this water to you, see your beauty in its crystalline reflection.

I pour the water for you, my Goddess.
Take this water to your self, bring it to your lips and taste its sweet taste.
Quench your thirst, the water does well for the greenness in your heart.
Partake of the water, O Lady of the House, and renew your youth in peace.

Presentation of Food

I bring you cakes, you protector of Osiris.
I fill your offering plates with all of the bounty that the land has to offer.
Come to these your divinities and enjoy in their flavors.
Take this eye of Horus to yourself so that your body will be whole.
Take this eye of Horus to yourself so that your body will be strong,
So that you may start the new year sated and refreshed.

Presentation of Ma’at

I offer you Ma’at on this day, as you offer Ma’at to Atum.
Partake of this Ma’at, as Re does daily.
Truly, your beauty radiates ever further when Ma’at is within your heart.
Truly your power is mighty when Ma’at is firm upon her seat.
Ma’at is in all of your shrines, in all of their places.
She sits before you, she sits within you. She is yours forever.
Smell her sweet scent within your nostrils, feel her weight within your chest.
Feel Ma’at as she resides within you.
Feel feel the joy that her presence brings to your life.
Hear the music that she sings within your heart.
Take Ma’at to yourself, and be whole.

Reversion of Offerings

O you fierce kite, your enemies have fallen and no longer exist.
Everything is renewed and restored throughout the Two Lands.
Take these offerings to yourself as I take these offerings to myself in the name of reversion of offerings.
Release these offerings to your servant, so that I may partake of what you partake of.
So that I might become whole and renewed as the NTRW.

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Posted by on July 17, 2019 in Kemeticism, Making Ma'at, Year of Rites

 

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Healing and Destruction: Two Sides of the Same Coin

When I was younger, I wanted to be a veterinarian. I loved animals, and I thought it would be a nice idea to help heal and save the animals that I loved. That is until I realized that in order to be a vet, you must be willing and able to also kill animals when treatment was not available or working. And with the mention of that, I decided the profession was not for me. Life’s funny like that, because despite my best efforts to move away from death and destruction, my life Over There landed me neck deep in both. Over the years I have made a lot of vague passing comments about the nature of my life Over There, but I’ve never really gone into any amount of depth or detail regarding the work I do. As with most everything I do, this has been done on purpose, as I’ve always felt that talking about it would result in one of two things: people looking at me like I’ve lost my marbles while they whisper “special snowflake” to their closest friends, or people looking at me with horror while they call me a monster. Both options lead to suck so I’ve never bothered.

However, recent discussions about the nature of ma’at and the nature of the gods has led me to decide to finally open up about some of what I do Over There. I guess we can consider it getting an early start to the work Set has laid out for me this year.

Usually when I sum up my work Over There, I de-fang and sterilize everything down to “I heal and destroy”. It sounds pretty simple and straightforward, but it’s honestly anything but. I’ve noticed over the years that many people seem to have troubles understanding how these two things can live so closely together, as seen by goddesses such as Sekhmet. However, let me assure you that the two are opposite sides of the same coin, as with the veterinarian mentioned above. In order to be able to heal, you must also be adept at being able to kill, and one can easily lead into the other.

I never expected to end up in this role, and taking up this sort of “work” happened very organically- at least on my end. I still can’t tell if Set and Osiris came to me because they foresaw what I was capable of doing, or if this is all just icing on top of their already made cake. At first I tried to escape the role that lay before me. However, the more I ran, the faster it caught up with me, and eventually I ended up embracing what was laying at my feet. Anything else resulted in more discomfort. Sometimes it’s easier to find solace in what you are than to continually deny what is written in front of your face.

Much like with my gods where Set came first and Osiris followed, my work started with destruction and I didn’t learn some of the finer points of healing until much later. Destruction came very easily to me from a very early point in my astral work. This is mainly due to my ability to access the deeper points of people Over There. I don’t even have to really try, and I can fall into some of the deepest darkest parts of a person or a plane (because planes can have embodiments and cores, just as humanesque entities do), places where it’s very easy to do damage. Waking up neck deep in astral fuckery meant that I had to kill sometimes in order to survive. Sometimes I needed to destroy a place, person, or item in order to get away and restore some semblance of balance or totality to my existence. Destruction was very necessary when I first started out. I had to clear out the wreckage of my house in order to actually address the foundations below.

The need to heal people was pretty quick to follow, though. Turns out that when you’re popping up in these horrible places to collect parts of yourself, you often find other people who are just as screwed up as you are. I found myself wanting to help these people, and wanting to help heal them as best as I could. I also think that I secretly hoped that I would be able to avoid killing things because healing them was the solution to everything. I didn’t realize at the time that this isn’t really the case- healing is not always a solution, nor is it always the best solution.

Shortly after, Osiris began to teach me how to use the river to heal myself and others as well. We’d branch from using my particular river to using vats of water in general. I learned various methods of picking nasty bits out of people’s energy lines, and I began to work on learning how to heal cores and core spirits. I felt as though I might have found a solution to everything- I would heal whatever I came across instead of killing it.

The problem is, healing doesn’t really work that way.

Death and destruction are part of a healer’s arsenal. When someone from Over There opens up their proverbial medical bag, death and destruction are one of the first things to be pulled out. The first method that Osiris showed me, after all, involved drowning in order to facilitate the ability to heal. It doesn’t get much more morbid than that.

And even if you’re not using death or destruction to heal, sometimes killing is still an unavoidable side effect. Sometimes you work your ass off trying to heal someone, and the healing still does not stick. The healing doesn’t work because the person isn’t ready, or in some cases, the person doesn’t even want to be healed anymore. I had a man that I ended up calling Waffles because he kept waffling in his healing so much. Some weeks he wanted to live and wanted to stay with me forever. And then other weeks he’d withdraw entirely, and wish for death.

Eventually, the death won out. Part of being the healer is being able to put someone out of their misery if you need to (or if they want it). Another part of being a healer is being able to put someone down if they are becoming a serious danger to you or others. Sometimes death is the best way to facilitate the healing. And of course, we can’t forget the other popular end result- which is when the healing works out so well that the person passes on by their own choice, leaving you with a surprisingly empty room one morning. All of these results are not only possible, but common when it comes to healing Over There.

To bring this into a more mundane aspect, you can even see destruction in the healing we perform here on Earth. Ever taken antibiotics? That involves killing bacteria in your system in order to get better. Destruction facilitates the restoration of balance within your system. Destruction can sometimes lead to ma’at – which is exactly why we have less than peaceful deities in our pantheon. Sometimes peace and passivity are not the answer.

And perhaps that is why I have ended up with the selection of gods that I have. Set’s destruction and Osiris’ passivity give me the best of both worlds, and in many ways both of their tasks fall into the same category: healing, or the restoration of balance for a person, plane, or realm. Sometimes killing and death are required in order to restore that balance. Sometimes good old fashioned nurturing and healing are required to restore the balance. Sometimes you need both in equal measure.

I was once hopeful that I could use all of what I have learned regarding healing to wipe away all of the red on my hands from everything I have destroyed or killed. But since then I have learned that healing doesn’t wipe the red away. It simply adds to the richness of the color. Life without death does not exist, nor does healing exist without destruction, as both are inseparably linked.

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A Good Horse: 6 Months Later

Last year I had asked all of my readers to consider what they would do when a god pushes too far. To consider how they would react if the relationships they had with one or more of their deities suddenly fell apart and exploded all around them. How would they rebuild? How would they proceed with their religious endeavors?

It’s not an easy thing to answer. With something like a house, its very straight forward. You clear away the rubble and you rebuild your foundations. In short, you start from scratch. But with a relationship, especially a relationship with a non-physical entity, its not so clear cut. How do you start from scratch with a god? How to you rebuild the trust that was lost? How do you overcome the anger and hurt that you feel so that you can even look at one another again without scowling?

How do we take a relationship that has gone bad and get it back into neutral territory?

Marseille, statue, cheval, stone horse by Jeanne Menj via Flickr

Last year I got to experience first hand what happens when a long term relationship falls apart. I got to be on the receiving end of a deity that went too far and we both got to experience the results of what happens when I’m pushed to my limits. Last year, I got to experience what it was like to essentially be broken. At the time that it was happening, I knew that there was a reason for it. I knew that I needed to go through this first hand so that I could report back to everyone else and teach them how to do it better than I did. I knew that this was all part of a bigger picture plan that Set was concocting and that his words were both laced with truth and falsity all at once. And above all, I knew that there was no stopping it.

I knelt down on the ground and listened to him tell me that I was good at destroying things. I felt the lump in my throat as he told me that the community wasn’t everything that I needed to be doing. I felt that lump sink to my chest in the fall when Osiris told me that he was the other side to Set’s coin, and that their work for me would be in tandem. And then the lump fell into my stomach when fall shifted to winter and I realized that both of them were right in their own ways.

This is a 6 month check in on how I coped with my falling out with Set. This is also a story on how I have attempted to rebuild the foundations of my relationship with Set and Osiris.

_____________________

After Set and I had our initial blow up, things were incredibly tense. The next few weeks were filled with short and snippy conversations. A few weeks after that, those short conversations shifted into yelling matches. And within a month or so, we were almost not talking at all. By the time that I had released my Good Horse post, we were pretty much not speaking unless we had to. Any time I’d show up to work with Set, he’d stand there and stay silent. He figured that opening his mouth meant that he could insert his foot, and so in his eyes, silence trumped speaking.

Truth be told, this was probably for the best. As soon as Set realized he had done some major damage, he stepped back and gave me space. He got mildly better at not reacting if I yelled at him. Instead he’d stand there quietly and keep his comments to himself. I was given space because more pressure on his end would have only made it worse.

So when a god fails you, I would say that the best first step is some breathing room. You and the deity need some space to get your thoughts together. How long this period needs to be will vary. I didn’t start talking to Set again until after I got back from the Duat. That is about 2 months of yelling and barely talking, and nearly 3 or 4 months of not speaking at all.

About the same time that Set completely backed off from me, I noticed that Wpwt stepped forward. I can’t tell if Wpwt has long term aims for me or not, but I certainly know that his sudden appearance was not coincidental. I joke about how Set must have cornered him in a bar and cried on Wpwt’s shoulder about how badly he had screwed up, and how he then begged Wpwt to do something to fix it, and for all I know the joke is accurate.

Either way, Wpwt came forward and began to talk with me about the situation I found myself in. For the record, Wpwt is much smoother with his words than Set is. He offered me perspective about not only my situation, but the situation that Set was in. He highlighted the difficulties that the whole pantheon faces in this day and age, and he gave me other ways to look at things.

In other words, he initiated the process of my shifting of attitude towards Set. Had Wpwt not talked with me, I don’t know how long it would have taken me to realize these things. Even now, I am grateful for his assistance with the whole situation.

So the second step in repairing a messed up devotee/deity relationship is to gain perspective. This can be through other deities or other practitioners. Wpwt talked to me about how Set’s hands are bound in a lot of ways by the upper echelons of the pantheon. He talked to me about how things are not as smoothly running as we’d like to believe. He knocked some sense into my head so that I could, at the very least, start being in the same room with Set without throwing things at him.

He began the process of healing for the whole situation.

By this point, Osiris had taken center stage and I was preparing to fall into the Duat. Due to the circumstances I was in, I wouldn’t see Set at all until I came out the other side, and by the time the “other side” came, I found that I was angry with both deities, and that I’d need to work on figuring out what to do with both of my relationships.

But why was I so angry? That’s probably the question on everyone’s mind. I’ve been dancing around just what Set asked me last year, and what Osiris told me he had in mind for my future with him because I’ve not been sure how everyone would respond to it. But it’s really hard to follow the whole story without having the actual whole story to go off of.

The long and short of what Set and Osiris have asked of me is this:

Set would like to use my abilities as someone who can kill and destroy over in the Unseen. According to him, he is bound by paperwork and red tape, and that there are some places, realms, and people he can’t get to because of it. I would be someone he would send to a location behind the scenes. I’d go in, handle the person, and leave. The downside to this is that it creates a huge target on your back and can create a lot of problems if you realm-jump regularly. Nothing like landing in a realm only to be thrown in jail because you killed someone important. Plus, it creates a lot of mental stress for me, and I’d be neck deep in death, which I don’t like.

Osiris wants me to heal and work with dead people. He says the Duat needs healing, that the land itself needs repair. And that dead spirits need care too. He would like to see me develop these skills both here and in the Unseen.

Both are interested in my community work, but that’s more Set’s bent.

Both deity’s requests center around my ability to tinker in someone’s core. To heal someone effectively, you need to go to their source, their core. To kill someone totally, you need to destroy their source, their core. Both the life and death aspect of things are tied together through one common skillset. Both Set and Osiris are tied together in this, and they know it.

For them, these tasks are not a “you pick one or the other”. It’s more a case of “you get both of us together and you will deal with it.” These two are tied together through a death, and I think in a grand scheme kind of way, it makes sense.

Well great. I understand their link, but both of these aspects still leave me in situations I don’t want to be in. They both leave me dealing with death on a regular basis.

However, more and more I question my ability to escape some of the aspects that I dislike about my astral life. The notion of somehow falling off of the radar to live a quiet life is unlikely for a variety of reasons. At least if I had a god’s backing, it may give me some political bargaining power in at least a few realms.

After my time in the Duat was done, Osiris sent me home to rest. I didn’t leave my bedroom for probably a month while I waited for my body to heal up. During that time, I had a lot of hours to kill, and I killed them mulling the situation I was in. I weighed the pros and the cons, I concocted ways to get out of things, to circumvent things, to find a way to spin this more in my favor.

I started by leveling with them. I talked with them about what I truly needed to make this work. I asked them to give me answers about specific questions (such as: how are you going to keep me from losing my mind from all of this? How will we handle my stress from all of this? What will you do when my anxiety starts to kill me?). I am currently waiting on their responses to these questions. I began to ask better questions about what they are planning. I began to work on handling my anxiety in the Seen so that I could at least consider their proposals, which I still don’t have in a final format.

All of these emotions and anger and frustration and I’m right where they wanted me to begin with. I’m sitting down at the bargaining table, trying to at least get an in-depth understanding of what they want from me.

And that is where I am at six months later. I am still a little bitter and frustrated at them, but no longer seething with anger or rage. I’m beginning to understand that the Unseen is filled with tricksters and tinkerers, and that the gods are no exception. No one is immune to it. And so I’m trying to figure out how to make this work in my favor because I currently can’t figure out a way to get out of it entirely. It will probably still be another year before I make any decisions, but at least I can gather my information now and move forward slowly.

Although the fact that I am considering their offers really makes me wonder if I was actually broken in as a horse would be. Does this mean that they won? Is that even the correct way to look at it? I’m not sure.

_____________________

I get that this post is long, so I’m going to sum up the short version here:

When a god dicks you over, I consider doing the following:

  • Give each other space. This includes from the deity’s side. Ask them to give you time to process things.
  • Get perspective if you can. Whether from other Unseen entities/gods or from devotees or other people you know. Weigh the perspectives to see what you want to do moving forward.
  • Take things slowly. Don’t let anyone bully you into moving quicker than you are comfortable with.
  • If it appears that the relationship is too far destroyed, look into getting some godly back-up and assistance in severing the connection with that god.
  • If the relationship can be salvaged, I recommend talking it out with the god. Being honest and frank with one another with where you are at. This may take months to accomplish, so take your time. Not everything needs to be addressed in one conversation.

As for my own deity relationships:

I was pissed at Set and Osiris for throwing me into things I question if I can handle. However, recent events have made me seriously consider what they have in the future for me, and I am currently working on a number of things to see if its something I can hack. Our bargaining is on-going, and I wouldn’t expect anything final for a number of months.

 

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Modern Mythology: I <3 Balls Day

Gather around the camp fire once again as we delve into the myths and stories of our religion!

Set

During the ongoing battle for the Kingship of Egypt, Set and Horus found themselves in a large predicament. You see, each deity had been damaged from this battle – one losing his eye, and the other his testicles. It’s very painful to lose your testicles, you know! Through a series of wiley tricks and maneuvers, however, both were able to get their missing pieces restored to their former glory.

What Set didn’t know at the time, however, is that Thoth – “Astute in His Plans Who Fashioned All Things, Including Set’s Nuts” – gave him an even better set of balls as a way of saying thank you for taking the bad rap for the whole “felling Osiris” thing. When Set received his new shiny set of testicles, he was amazed at their awesomeness. It was like having a disco in his pants.

He was so ecstatic about his new hardware that Set ran to the highest point of Egypt and yelled out across the land “These are the best balls ever! Look at how amazing they are! I will surely be able to use them to smite apep every day!” Everyone was so happy for his new shiny testicles that a festival was proclaimed in their honor. And in our modern calendar, that day is February 14th- the day of <3-ing Your Balls.

You can see the effects of this festival almost everywhere you look! There are stands of balls in grocery stores. Ball shaped candies and candy containers. Ball shaped jewelry. Ball shaped everything! All as glorious and magnificent as Set’s newborn testicles.

When celebrating this holiday, it is customary to deck out your shrine is as many ball-shaped items as possible. Set loves the color red, so the redder, the better. However, he does has a soft side and can appreciate balls of other colors. Be sure to spend some time reflecting on your own personal badassery and taking the time to remember just how great you really are. You can also use this time to ask Set and Thoth in assistance in making your own balls better- as a means of seizing your potential and making tough choices that require balls to make!

With the proper heka, Thoth can assist you in creating a disco in your pants, too!

___________________

Every year around February we see nearly every grocery store in America fill up with tons of pink and red Valentine’s Day stuff. Usually, this is a holiday I don’t participate in at all. I’ve never cared for the concept behind it, and I’ve just never really gotten into the habit of doing anything for V-Day.

However, my foray into Kemeticism has changed my perspective on this holiday. Set’s main symbol is his balls. For most of us, we take a standard heart and turn it upside down to make it into a set of balls (which may not be too far off of what the heart used to mean). So now the second half of January and the first half of February is nothing but balls for me. It’s turned from a holiday about romance into a holiday about Set.

And his balls.

I feel like this can be shifted into a modern festival or rite that we can use within our community for seizing the day, taking hold of our courage and reminding ourselves of our greatness (in the same way that Set reminds me of his greatness all the time). If you’d like to give it a shot, there are two methods for this particular heka. One version, which involves a large chocolate heart, can be found here. The second, which involves good old fashions paper, is below:

  • Sheet of paper- 8.5″x11″. Any color will do, I recommend red or purple.
  • Writing utensils of whatever color you’d like.
  • A situation or trait you need to find some courage to tackle.
  • This tutorial about folding.

Start with your paper- figure out what situation you need some courage with. On the inside of your paper, write the situation down. You can be as specific or generalized as you need to be. Feel free to use sigils or different colors for different things. Get as creative as you want.

Then, fold up your paper into the shape of the balls using the tutorial above. If possible, place your balls in a location where you can see them regularly. If your situation is at work, perhaps leave them on your desk. If it is something to do with money, maybe leave it in your wallet. If you’re unsure, leave them on your shrine for the gods to keep an eye on.

Hopefully the heka provided in this post can help you to gain some courage and celebrate your awesomeness this Valentine’s Day! If you have any questions regarding these rites, or try these rites out for yourself- please let me know!

Other Modern Mythology Posts:

 
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Posted by on January 21, 2014 in Kemeticism, Rambles

 

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A Good Horse

I don’t know how many of you out there have ever had horses. Or more specifically- have raised horses. But for those of you that haven’t, there is a concept that a horse is useless to a person until they are broke.

Yes, broke.

When you take a foal and “train” it to wear saddles and tolerate bits and halters, the process if called “breaking” the horse. And one of the selling points of a horse is that they are “broke”. You can’t usually ride the horse or do anything with the horse until this process is finished, and there are a variety of methods for breaking horses – some being very humane, some being very very cruel.

This is a story about a horse being broken.

_______________

“There will always be wolves” he tells me after the fact. That is his justification for all of this. “There will always be wolves, and I need to make sure that my children (his word, not mine) can handle that.” You see, to him- raising strong, self-reliant people outranks anything else. The idea that wolves will always be present apparently drives him to break you in. Because I suppose once you’re broken enough and yet are still surviving- that means you can survive anything.

In short, he likes to make “mini-Sets”. But to understand how we got here, we’ve got to go backwards to where this all started.

You see, I hail from the astral-ghetto. I wasn’t always in the ghetto, but sometimes bad things happen, and bad people cross your path and screw up your existence for the next 3457459823484957 years. It was that kind of situation for me. I originally began to work with my astral existence only because I knew I had fallen into trouble, and I feared that my life here would be shortened if I didn’t straighten out some of the crap in my astral life.

Knowing the why behind a situation can really set a scene. It would be years after I started working with Set when I’d be kneeling down on the stone floor of the Pit, contending with all of the trappings of the astral ghetto and losing my patience with this deity. You’d think after all of the hell he had led me through that I’d be okay with anything at this point, but we all have our limits.

I have honestly forgotten how this particular conversation started, but I do remember the hard floor in particular. I know that many people know me for not being someone who worships the gods, but I do know when kneeling is appropriate. And I have spent more than my fair share of time in front of He Who Makes the Sky Shake on my knees. I remember staring at the floor when I lost my patience with him. My patience because he was slowly taking everything that he had pushed me towards in the 4 years prior and throwing it out the window.

That’s how it starts, when you break your horse in. You ween them. You ween them from all of the comfort that they knew.

Set started it with the community. This boat paddling venture is my baby. My whole life revolves around Kemetics and paddling my tiny canoe between as many Kemetic islands as I can muster. And that is where he started.

“That is more my brother’s thing” he told me that particular evening. “I really don’t care too much about what happens with all of that. I don’t need followers. If anything, you pushing more people towards me means I’ve got to fill out more paperwork. I’d probably be better off if you just stopped with that all together.”

I could feel the first cracks in my practice forming. This boat paddling, pot stirring adventure that Set had been pushing shoving me into- was suddenly not his idea or concern.

I remember the hard floor under my knees. I drag my fingers along the grooves in the stone as I try to find some semblance of sanity in that particular moment. I ask him what on earth he wants me around for- if its not to help promote the ma’at sharing between devotees and gods. That reciprocal back scratching that we’re all supposed to be aiming for.

And as though it was nothing he states his case for me. His future that he sees for me. A future that is completely separate from anything Kemetic related. Something that would, indeed, make me into a ‘mini-Set’. A job that has been known to eat me alive in the past and would shove me ever further into the astral ghetto. A job that would keep me up at night and possibly ruin what little shred of normalcy I have in my waking life.

He looks at me as the smoke wafts up from his pipe. He’s frustrated because this isn’t how he wanted to broach this topic. No no no, he wanted to paint it into something far prettier so that I would be more inclined to say yes. But in this moment- this is how the cards played out, and this is what he has to work with.

Angry at the audacity, I ask him why on earth I would do that for him. And the conversation degrades from there.

And so I left.

Now, when things like this happen, they kinda happen slowly- in ways you don’t realize. I didn’t notice it, but Set had been chipping at this for a while. Little comments here. Little nuances there. Little things that escaped me at first. I think I sped up his timeline by forcing the issue, and so I was no longer allowed to ease into the notion, but instead had the whole house collapse on my head and around my feet. I rolled around in my anger for a couple of weeks. I quit showing up to see Set, and when I finally did speak with him again, I no longer provided offerings or incense upon arrival. I was furious at him, and refused to give him anything but the bare basics of civility.

We’d play this game for a while. We were still on talking terms, but we were nowhere near friendly. He promised to help me figure some stuff out because my life was falling apart- but he’d fall through on that, too.

It was during these months that I really began to question why we worship gods at all- when they seem to be incapable of doing anything worthwhile for most of us. Set would slowly continue to tell me things that broke apart what most of us believed made up the Kemetic practice. He’d slowly unpick every bit of religious structure that I thought was important until there was pretty much nothing left.

And one day I woke up and decided I wanted to burn what was left of my metaphorical house down.

“Match” by Ian Hayhurst

To me the Kemetic community and my Kemetic practice are like living in a house. This blog is part of it, my Kemetic groups and Tumblr associates are a part of it. And with Set more or less ripping apart everything I thought I had known, I felt entirely ostracized from everyone and I felt like my whole “house” might not last the storm. So in order to cut it to the chase- I decided I would burn the whole damned thing to the ground.

I did this in a series of posts that I expected to completely and utterly bomb and fail because they contained hard truths within them. If you’ve been reading for any amount of time, you probably recognize them, they are: The Nuances of Non-Physical Relationships, On Being Broken and Musings on Pain and Astral Travel. Each post has documented my slow breakdown and unlearning of what I thought I had known.

In Nuances, I set up the notion that perhaps gods could overstep our boundaries and push us in places that we shouldn’t go. I set the stage for the next post where I mused over what we should do when a god fails us. These musings were largely ushered in by Set’s seeming disregard for my sanity or lack of concern for my general well-being, I fumbled around with what the hell to do if he pushed me to a point that I could no longer work with him. I rounded this out with the final post on the astral and pain where I mentioned that large chunks of my own life have been destroyed by astral work and that you should consider whether you really want that in your life, lest it consume you entirely.

With each post I worked through my anger with him and grappled with what had happened between us. What the worst part about all of it is – its exactly what he wanted.

And I knew it. I knew from the get-go that this was part of what he wanted.

As he handed the matches to me and told me to torch the whole place, I knew I was playing right into his hands, and it pissed me off even more. “I am going to destroy your stability and your life so that you can go out there and write about how horrible we gods can be.”

The thing about it is, we all “know” that gods can be jerks. We all “know” that they will push us to reach potentials and goals (sometimes our goals, sometimes their goals) and we all “know” that we can say “no”. But sometimes no matter what you do, you are playing right into their hands and there isn’t a damned thing you can do about it.

The deity in question shoves a bit in your mouth and straps a saddle onto your back and you can crowhop and buck and roll around on the ground, but at the end of the day you’re going to succumb to the fact that you are being broken.

Because you’re useless if you’re not broken.

And so in my anger of being the Tesla of Kemetics and the fact that Set gave no fucks about anything, I lit my house on fire and I watched it burn as I released each post. And the weirdest sensation overcame me. I felt liberated.

Liberated. Free. Totally and utterly free of everything as I watched with eagerness over what would happen with each post.

To go back to Blacker’s book, she talks about undergoing gyo, or trials and hardships, when you’re working on your ascetic powers. She says that many people who undergo gyo end up being pushed to a breaking point and when they can no longer take it anymore- suddenly they are filled with renewed vigor and strength- and this is how they manage to get through everything.

I don’t know if that’s what I experienced, or if it was just a case of complete dissociation with everything I had worked to build over the past few years. But either way, I was elated to announce every post that would burn down my house. I was ecstatic to see what would happen.

And now I am at the end of the venture. Despite worrying that I would alienate every other Kemetic and polytheist in a 10 mile radius, my “house” still stands (if not a bit stronger for the adventure). However, despite having come through the house-burning intact, I can’t help but feel like something is still broken.

Because much like with the membrane mentioned in my Astral Pain post- sometimes once the blindfold is ripped off of your eyes, you can’t unsee the blinding light. And even though people have appreciated what I’ve written and I understand why Set led me where he did- at the end of the day, the basics still haven’t changed. He still wants me to do things that I’m not okay with doing, and because of the mental wringer I was run through my Kemetic practice will likely never be what it once was again.

I am, for all intents and purposes, broken in some capacity or another.

I suppose that makes me a good horse in some respects, but now it begs to ask- what do I do from here?

 
 

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KRT: The Importance of Mythology

Mythology: How necessary is it? Does it affect your practice? Should it?

If there is one thing that ancient Egypt has a lot of- its myths. Myths of all shapes and sizes and variations- some of which are zaney while others are completely mind boggling. Mythology is one of those great topics that can spawn off lots and lots and lots of interesting and thought provoking conversations. However, mythology can also be a source of headaches and rage amongst Kemetics because many times, we don’t see eye to eye on the myths at hand. I personally find it very interesting to see how other Kemetics use mythology because it really runs the gamut. Some Kemetics don’t use mythology at all, and some take it as a sort of gospel truth.

I, personally, lie somewhere in the middle.

Mythology is very important to me. I feel like myths help us to understand the nature of the deities that we work with. Only by understanding the Osirian myth cycle can I even begin to understand how Set and Osiris might function together and why they might put aside their differences to work with me. I also find that a lot of the symbolism and actions that both gods use with me are heavily tied to their own myths.

Because of this, I feel like if I didn’t know the myths surrounding my gods – to some extent, I’d be missing a huge chunk of what makes up both Set and Osiris. It’s kind of like not knowing your spouse’s childhood, or what your best friend’s favorite foods are.

But its more complicated than that because Egypt’s mythology changed over time. The Osirian myths that I focus on changed multiple times over the course of 3,000 years and it can create so many problems. Most of us know Plutarch’s version, but its entirely inaccurate in comparison to the Egyptian version – and even the Egyptian version changed over the centuries. For just this myth alone, there are probably 4 or 5 versions. So as you can see, it becomes very murky very quickly. Its because of this that I can’t take the myths literally, and I feel like picking one myth while throwing out all of the other variations misses the point all together, because each version of the myth holds some truth to it.

So how does myth come into play in my practice?

Well, sometimes myths will help me to form rituals for holidays. The Mysteries ritual that I use stems from the mythology and symbolism surrounding the felling of Osiris. As he fell into the water and sank into nothingness, I wrap him in blue, watery fabric and store him away in the kar shrine for a month- so that he can come out whole and new again. Mythology also teaches us important concepts such as Zep Tepi- which comes to play in my Osirian ritual (as well as my shrine setup and shadow work).

I also use a lot of mythology in what I offer to the gods. It is said in the Contendings that Set’s favorite food is lettuce- so I am always sure to have romaine lettuce on hand for him. Other myths discuss how Set is related to the foreleg of an ox, and that links to the Big Dipper- which ultimately links to meteors and iron- so I offer him pieces of iron and iron pyrite because the mythos and symbolism tied to him says he would like it.

But above all, I use the myths to understand how these two gods act.

Osiris’ role in his own mythology is very passive. He undergoes his felling with minimal confrontation. He succumbs to the water, he lays inert. Only in a few versions does he actually free himself- instead its always his son who gets him out of the mess he’s in. The mythology tells me that Osiris is likely to be a more passive deity. He will likely be calm, quiet and understated- because that is how the myths present him.

But he is more than that. In the myth where he coaxes Ra to give up his Atef, we see that Osiris can be petty and egotistical- by not only seizing a crown that he is ill prepared for, but also by forcing his brother to give up his lands and bow down to him. Osiris isn’t always the shrewd man that we make him out to be. He can aim high and miss the mark, too.

Set is a very violent and forward god in most of myths. He goes after what he wants and he gets it – provided the other gods actually allow him to. According to Griffiths, he also shows remorse for what has happened regarding his brother, and both Meeks and Naydler mention that there was more going on than meets the eye- so it’s possible that Set carries guilt and can understand hard choices and making mistakes. His myths also indicate that he understands what its like to get the short stick or raw end of a deal- as he has had plenty of those in his own time.

The mythology surrounding these two brothers also reveals that there is a hard past that exists between them. And that when you first approach them, you should likely take it into consideration. The myths tell us a bit about each of these deities. They reveal small truths that might go missed if you didn’t read the stories that form their past. Even if the mythologies are purely fictional- there are still small truths to be seen- both in how the gods act, and how the ancients perceived them.

I think there is power in that.

And I think that power can reveal things about ourselves, too.

And as the myths slowly bridge the gap between ourselves and the gods, we slowly begin to live and understand the essence of mythological time and how that can affect us. We get intimate with these myths because they are suddenly tied to ourselves and a part of ourselves. And through getting intimate, we can learn even more about the gods we interact with, and the varying levels of complexity that exists within ourselves.

I can take a story about Set felling his brother in a river, and see how sometimes life forces us to make decisions that we don’t like. I can see it from Set’s eyes- how emotion, anger, guilt, and duty can mix and mingle and drive me to make hard decisions because they have to be made. I can understand how Osiris feels as I succumb to the water because there is no other way. Because sometimes life crushes us- and that’s okay- but it is a part of life. I understand the nuance of making the hard decision to succumb to the water because I know that is the only way out of the situation. I learn about being passive and active all in the same moment and how that dichotomy – which seems contradictory at first – can actually benefit me if used properly.

I begin to see myths not only as simple “stories” but as useful tools to understand the world around me. The myth quits being words on paper and actually becomes a living, breathing landscape I can learn in. A safe place to let my mind work out problems and understand things that I might not have otherwise.

Myths are important tools in my practice. Even if its not evident or obvious, the myths surrounding Osiris and Set permeate my practice on every level, because I have picked these myths apart and lived them. I continue to reevaluate what I think each round of myths means and what it means to me and my life and the relationship I have forged with my gods. And every time I think I’ve learned all that I can about the Osirian myth cycle- I turn it a few degrees in a different direction- and I see something else that I had missed entirely before.

The myths keep me learning- not only about the gods, but about myself.

To see the master list for this topic, please visit here.

 

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The Necessity of Death

I’ve been reading Carmen Blacker’s “The Catalpa Bow” recently, which is a book on shamaism within Japan.

In this book, Blacker goes over the practices and rituals that a medium or ascetic (her terms) must go through in order to gain their abilities. One of the most common themes within these regimes is pain that would break an “ordinary” person. Pain comes in many forms including a very strict, malnourishing diet, cold buckets of water poured over a person- regardless of the temperature outside, sleeplessness and repetition of numerous norito and sutras. According to the people who practice these routines, they describe the experiences as excruciating- but at the very moment when they think they can’t hack it anymore, they suddenly find themselves filled with renewed energy and gusto.

One evening, after a night of pot stirring, I was musing on the nature of death. It’s very common for me to hit rock bottom regularly, and I had been teetering above that point regularly at the time. I noted that, despite my recent low- that evening I was particularly focused and clear. Things made sense, and I felt as though my fire and clarity had returned me- however brief. While I was thinking over this, Set shows up and asks me if I had ever considered that perhaps it is death that gives me my fuel and drives me forward.

Or perhaps it could be phrased if I had ever considered if death gives me my sekhem.

And that’s when I connected the dots between what Blacker had described in her books, and what I had been experiencing all along in the Pit and the River. Whenever I hit the bottom of the bottom, I find myself in these places and I die a little death. And in the convulsions of death, I am ripped apart and I shed my old skin, and I resurface, filled with more energy to continue on another day.

Sometimes the death isn’t small. Sometimes its really really big.

Sometimes I will find myself laying in a mental anguish for weeks wondering how the hell I’m going to figure a way out of this mess that is my life. There are many times when I lay there and think that I seriously have hit rock bottom and I just can’t do this anymore.

And it never fails that when I hit the lowest of the low that somehow I am reborn. Much like the mythos surrounding Osiris, I mentally rip myself apart until there is nothing left, and then when I can’t even find myself anymore, I am hit with a sudden onset of clarity and find it within me to step forward and keep moving onward.

Tonight is one of those such nights. After weeks of rolling around in a mental and physical fog- I am struck with such clarity that my mind feels like it’s going to break open at any given second because it just makes that much sense to me. Much like the people in Blacker’s book who go through weeks of hell as a means to strip their bodies of any excess so that they may be rendered barren to be reborn anew, I have wallowed in my own mental filth long enough to break free and in so doing, have hit a type of epiphany for myself.

In this, I research about the Sekhem Scepter to further understand what Set is referring to when discussing the source of my sekhem. And it is during this search in my Reading Egyptian Art book that I find out that Osiris is heavily tied to the Sekhem Scepter. In fact, one of his epithets is “Great Sekhem” or “Foremost of Powers”. Combine this with Set’s inability to ever die and it becomes even clearer how these two form the duality that is not only my cracked out practice, but myself.

One never dies. He constantly becomes reborn and in so doing, knows how to show another how to consistently claw your way back to the surface. The other can show you the ins and outs of the process of dying and being reborn because he had to go through it himself. In fact, if you will remember – it is the undying Set who pushed Osiris into the transformation that is death. Osiris can show you the ins and outs because his brother gave him the literal shove into the process.

My new thinking is that if you work with both and you can become adept at both. You can learn how to die and yet never die. You constantly become the person to initiate the death, work through the death and come out of the death still breathing, but better for it. An endless cycle that perpetuates upon itself.

He tells me that this is the source of my Sekhem, my power. That it is a part of me. Vital to me. That it is me.

I’m not sure what to make of that.

 

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