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Connected in Loneliness

I have been lonely for as long as I can remember, and I’ve handled it in various ways throughout my life. When I was younger, I disassociated all of those feelings away. As I got older, I found the “better” method of handling my loneliness was to funnel it into work. Because if you’re busy, you don’t have time to listen to the feelings gnawing in your stomach. Over the years, I’ve found that I could combine my incessant need to drown things out via work while also trying to fix my constant loneliness. Which is probably why TTR as you know it even exists.

In recent months, I’ve found that the topic of loneliness has been on my mind again. Due to the current circumstances of my life, I find that the feelings of abandonment and neglect that I would have experienced in my youth frequently bubble up to the surface. Because I’ve gotten better at being able to look at my feelings and remain somewhat detached from them, I’ve found that I’m able to actually inspect them before being overwhelmed by them. This has resulted in a fair amount of navel-gazing about loneliness and how it relates to a person’s personal religious practice. And by extension, how it relates to the gods, and whether they get lonely or not.

I suspect that being a member of a more “fringe” religion leads to loneliness playing a larger role in our community’s experience as a whole. Unlike being in the dominant religious group of wherever any of us is living, where you can find physical places to worship with other human beings, most of us are stuck creating our own religious experience in our own homes. I think its all very foreign, this trying to allocate resources to concoct, conceptualize, and implement whatever brings religious meaning to us while still engaging all of the other aspects of our busy lives. It’s a lot of extra work, and I think many of us don’t take the time to consider what impact that can lend to one’s religious experience. It’s a lot easier to build off of something that already exists than to have to figure out how to create it yourself from scratch. It’s a lot more motivating to participate in your religion if it is socially fulfilling or enriching.

In many respects, our choice in religion others us to a degree. And in that sense, our religion creates an ideal space to be lonely.

On a whim. I asked about loneliness and religion over on tumblr. I wanted to see how others relate to loneliness, and how that influences their religious practices. I left the question vague, as I wanted to see how people interpret loneliness without a wider context. I would say that most of the responses fell into a few categories:

  1. Loneliness is an act of being alone. This can allow for greater freedom to connect with the Divine, because there is no one around to interrupt you.
  2. Loneliness as a necessary tool or experiences. That some of our experiences are going to be inherently lonely, because we experience things differently as individuals. In most of these responses, the othering that comes with loneliness is temporary or situational, and not all-encompassing.
  3. Loneliness that separates a person from other people, as in being the only participant of your religion that you know of, or being the only non-white participant in your religious circle. This loneliness is pervasive and persistent.
  4. Loneliness that separates a person from the gods, as in not being able to connect with a deity as much as one would like, due to the fact that they aren’t living in physical forms we can interact with.

In these responses, I would argue that there are two over-arching relationships to loneliness. On one hand, it seems that people equate loneliness to being alone, nothing more and nothing less. On the other hand, it seems that people equate loneliness to being disconnected from others who are similar to themself, which is the definition I tend to err towards. From a mental health perspective, loneliness is not about being alone, it’s about being disconnected from other humans–regardless of how many humans are in physical proximity to you.

The ability to feel connected with people comes from a sense of someone being open and available to you, and by extension, you being open and available to them. It’s an open-door policy that works in both directions, respects both people’s needs and boundaries and leaves both people trusting the other with vulnerable aspects of themself. You can’t be connected with others unless you’re comfortable being vulnerable with them.

When you read that paragraph, how many people come to mind? How many people are you really connected with? How about your gods? Does the definition of connection apply to your relationship with them? Do you think that the gods feel connected with you?

Connection is ultimately the “cure” for loneliness, especially if its chronic in nature. And yet, according to most research, most of us do not feel connected with anyone. I might go so far to venture that many of us don’t even feel connected to ourselves. In recent months I have come to understand isfet as being “stuff that tears at the social fabric of human society,” and by that definition, loneliness might as well be a type of isfet because not only does loneliness make us miserable, it literally cuts your life short.

And if that’s the case, wouldn’t that make connection a form of ma’at? The balm that eradicates isfet from your life and restores the social fabric that us humans require to survive?

If 2019 is the year of making ma’at, then it stands to reason that this should be the year we start to tackle the loneliness that permeates our community. I don’t have any concrete solutions, but this is a call to action for anyone reading to start pondering about how we can work on helping members of our community to become more connected. Not only with each other or the gods, but also with ourselves. Figuring out who we are, making ourselves a priority allows us to give more space to other people when they are in a time of need. Treating ourselves as an important member of our own life helps us to form deeper, healthier relationships with others. Learning about yourself also teaches you how you want other people to treat you, and by extension, helps you create better boundaries, so that you can learn to trust people better. Which ultimately leads to… more ability to connect with others.

When you think about the loneliness that is in your own life or religious practice, what comes to mind? What helps you to feel connected to others? What steps are you performing to create more connection between yourself and others? What are you doing to help yourself become more connected with yourself?

Some resources to get the conversation started:

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Year of Rites: January

So when I first started this challenge I was thinking that I’d do a post after every rite but I realized pretty quickly that I can only say so much before its redundant so I decided that I’m going to start doing monthly recaps unless a rite is particularly involved or has a lot of commentary attached to it.

Rite for Geb

Satsekhem mentioned that she had a holiday for Geb pop up on her calendar, and made a rite for people to follow if they wanted to participate. It was last minute, but I knew I wanted to try and fit it in because I’m a try-hard, and so I worked to try and get everything done in preparation for it. I had been working for the better part of a day trying to get everything written down and all of the offerings in order, and I was about ready to get started when I had a funny image of Geb enter my mind, and I knew I needed to draw him an icon before I started.

(The expression was all him)

This brings me to the fact that it feels weird to do rituals to specific NTR with the generalized “NTRW” icon that I’ve got going. In some cases, when I am struck with the “inspiration”, I may start to make flat icons to use for rituals moving forward. Thereby adding another offering to the offering pile. Plus it means I’ll have an icon for the next time I want to honor them through ritual.

The rite went off without a hitch and there was nothing else of note that happened.

Propitiation of Sekhmet

I had learned from my previous weeks and decided to actually get a fair amount of offerings for this ritual. Because the propitiation of Sekhmet seems to heavily rely on offerings, I felt it made sense to put more effort into the offerings for this situation. This was the rite that felt the weirdest for the lack of proper icon. I had attempted to make one, but I didn’t like how it came out when I painted it, so I need to remake it.

I had originally wanted to dance for her and play music and stuff, but life got in the way and I could only read the rubric and call it a day. Hopefully next month I will be able to add in all of the other elements for a more rounded rite.

Festival of Ptah

Then Sat talked about this week-long festival for Ptah and, of course, I had to jump on board with it. Performing this ritual day after day really cemented for me that I could be more consistent with rituals at this stage in my life, and that I don’t mind doing them regularly. All in all, I’ve been feeling the urge to do rituals every day, and after doing this daily for a week (with the exception of the rite on Sunday, the 27th, because life got too busy and I had nothing to offer by the time I got home,) it feels really weird not to do something at the shrine every day.

I also attempted to make an icon for Ptah, but I hate it. I tried to make a different image, but I disliked that one more, so I returned to the original icon and fussed with it to see if it would ever come around to a state that I prefer, and it has yet to.

For whatever reason, I found myself having the urge to offer Ptah fresh greens from outside, so I did spend a fair amount of days offering him London Rock and Mallow, since both are in full force outside right now. I messed up my potassium in the process, but yolo or something, right?

Execration

I put off writing the execration rubric way too long. By this point in the month, depression and exhaustion were high, and this was the first point when I really went “I don’t want to do this today.”

But then I did it anyways.

Petitions were written the morning of the ritual and I folded them into snakes because I had no idea what else to do.

I wasn’t even sure how I was going to destroy these things up until I just up and did it. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to take them outside to set them on fire (ideal, because I didn’t want smoke in my room) or if I should put them in my brass urn and burn them elsewhere. I didn’t know if I should put the petitions on the shrine’s offering “table”, if I should open the shrine before starting or leave it closed, or whether I should do the initial execration away from the “holy space” that is the shrine.

I started without really having any of these specifics figured out, and it showed. I opted to just do my basic ritual at the shrine, because I didn’t know where else to do it, and I decided halfway through my rite that I would use my brass urn instead of flushing it or just leaving it in the compost bin, etc. So I had to pause in the middle of my rite and un-bury the urn and clean it out just to use it.  And then I just…. opted to just burn it in my room because I’m antisocial and didn’t want to deal with an audience if I decided to burn things in a more public space.

And so my room smelled of smoke for days.

And as you can see, my offering game is still rubbish. As my depression has set in, its become increasingly difficult to force myself to eat, and so its become very hard to figure out what to offer to the gods. Currently, offerings are still the biggest sticking point, and I’m determined to not resort to votive offerings, but its incredibly hard for me (never get disordered eating, kids! it’ll wreck your life!)

He Goes Forth

I was really looking forward to this rite, but it ended up not panning out as well as I had wanted. My schedule this week has been completely upended several ways, and so I didn’t prep for this ritual as much as I would have hoped. But it still went smoothly and I was able to give Wpwt several petitions to listen to. I can only hope my weak offering game won’t be a problem.

I have a very old icon that was given to me by someone. It was originally for Anup, but I’ve always associated it with Wpwt, so I opted to use that, since I wasn’t having an inspiration about any art. And while I feel like Wpwt was listening, he never said anything that I could catch, so I have very little to report on that front.

Upcoming February Rites

I wanted to have a small section where I talk about how February’s Year of Rites is going to go. As everyone knows, I’ve made rubrics for all of the basic rites that we’ll come across throughout the year, and I’ve been on the fence about whether each ritual for each month should be different, or if there would be benefit to repeating a ritual rubric several times throughout the year. Currently, I’ve decided that I’ll be reusing most of the rites from Jan for Feb. Here’s the breakdown:

  • Monthly Ma’at: This rite will be the same, but I will also be crafting my own version of this over here. I’ll be inserting it into the middle of the rite, right after “She exists before you forever”
  • Akhu: The same rite will be performed as January, with additional parts that are specifically tailored to my grandmother.
  • Propitiation: Same rite as January.
  • Execration: I need to make a new rite that doesn’t include Ptah, technically. More to come on this front.

See what others are doing:

 
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Posted by on January 31, 2019 in Kemeticism, Making Ma'at, Year of Rites

 

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Jan 31: He Opens the Way

So I had an idea that completely side-railed me that I want to try and do this year. I wanted to hold a ritual for Wpwt on Jan 31 as a means of opening up the rest of the year for continued success. In many ways, I consider January a liminal time. You’re still adjusting to the fact that it’s a new year. You’re probably still writing down the wrong date halfway through January. It’s a period of shifting from what was (the year prior) to what is (the current, new year.) Since Wpwt is associated with anything that goes first (such as the first born) because he opens the way for that First to happen, I thought it would be interesting to experiment with asking him to officially open up the year so that we can meet our goals and/or needs.

The version that I will be doing of this ritual will include petitions from others along with petitions for myself. For those who want to participate at home, you’re welcome to only read off your own requests to Wpwt, or you’re welcome to share them around and have multiple people read off your requests to Wpwt. If you’re reading this and want to participate but don’t have the ability to do so, feel free to contact me directly with what you’d like to submit for a petition, and I’ll add it to my ritual.


Approaching the Shrine:

O you two pillars of Ra, I rise up to meet you, and I enter between you.
I am one whose mouth is pure, whose teeth are strong,
and what I detest is wrong doing against Atum, because I honor Ma’at.
Oh you doorkeeper, prepare a path for me that I may pass,
for I am one who washes their mouth and who chews on myrrh, who lives on ma’at.
Prepare a path for me for I live on what they live on,
and I am alive and flourishing forever and ever.
I come and go between the two pillars of Ra and the two djed pillars of Geb.
I am one whose mouth is pure!

O He who separates the sky from the earth, in your powers guiding Ra on the hidden paths,
Allow me near to you. Allow me into your presence, in all of your places.
I have come that I might give great abundance in the presence of Wpwt.
I entering into the abode of the Great God,
I have come to you with my soul behind me and my authority before me.
I have made my way and I enter into your presence.
I am one of you.
Do not repulse me on the god’s path.
My feet are not impeded, I am not turned back from the god’s place.
I have looked upon you. I know you.
I have entered this place with ma’at in my heart.

*Step forward, or open the shrine, depending on your setup*

I open your temple. I come to you.
Your warmth and beauty surrounds me as I enter. I am not repulsed.
Behold, I have come to you to offer Ma’at,
to make sound the Eye for its lord.

Presentation of Light:

*Turn on light or light candle, etc.*

May you awake in Beauty, O Glorious Eye of Heru.
Be strong and renew your youth in peace.
You shine like Ra on the double horizon.
Your word is ma’at, by reason of your Eye, whole and pure.
The Eye of Horus destroys all of the enemies of the
Two Lands in all of their places.
Nothing is hidden from the fiery sight
Of the Eye of Horus, Glorious and Complete.

Purification of offering space:

*Take up water bowl/pitcher*

O water, may you remove all evil,
I give you essential water, O Wpwt, a tide in your time.
I bring the flood waters to purify your sanctuary.
I bring you the flood waters to purify your temple
and your statue in your place.

*wet your finger and touch the four sides of your shrine, offering table or plate, etc.*

O Wpwt, your altar is cleansed by the water;
Your altar is purified by the incense;
You are cleansed by Horus;
You are purified by Thoth.
Water invigorates your body;
It is I, your servant,
who comes to you in the palace where you reside.

Presentation of Libations:

Greetings to you, primordial water
Greetings to you, O river
Greetings to you, Great Flood,
You, the father of the gods.

*Pour the libation into a cup or bowl*

This libation is for you, O Glittering One.
This libation is for you, O Foremost of the Ennead, come drink it.
Take the vase filled with the emanations of your ka; it is what comes out of you
I pour for you the primordial water to satisfy your statue;
your heart is revived by the waters of youth
I have brought you this Eye of Horus and placed it at your feet.
I present to you that which flows from you
So that you may renew your youth in peace.

Presentation of Offerings:

I come near you, O Lord of the Heavens,
I bring the food and provisions for your subsistence.
Your altars are piled high with offerings of all sorts and forms.
Every follower, every servant, every devotee has come
To bring you the bounty of their hearts
So that you will truly be he who is satisfied among his offerings.

*place offerings on shrine/altar*

I am Hathor, the Lady of Nourishment;
Who multiplies the cakes and gives life
to the one who is faithful to her.
I have brought you nourishment
so that you may Thrive.
For as you Live, I Live.

Offering Ma’at:

Homage to you O He who opens the beautiful Path.
Who is Established upon His Seat.
I have placed myself on the floor in awe of you.
I embrace the earth before you.
I have come to you as Thoth, and my two hands are joined under ma’at.
Your ma’at is for you, O Great God,
She is in front of you, She emerges from your lips, She cuts your tongue.
Your heart lives when she rises before you.
Ma’at comes to you, in all of her radiance.
Your heart is glad when she appears before you.
She has come so that she may be with you.
Ma’at is in every place that is yours,
So that you may rest upon her.
Ma’at has taken her position within your shrine.
Thoth, the One who is Great of Magic, makes protection for you
And overthrows your enemies.
Ma’at is established throughout your Domain, truly twice established.
She resides in your heart for eternity.
Have peace and flourish through Her, O Lord of the Two Cobras.

O venerable god, I draw near to you.
Hear me, He who opens the body of his mother.
Hear me and see that the first month of 2019 is at an end.
The liminal time between yesterday and tomorrow is coming to a close.
As your servants take their first steps into the rest of the year,
I beseech you to open the path for the rest of 2019.

O He who knows the hidden ways,
Hear the words of your servants, and help them find their way forward
towards a more balanced, ma’at-driven life in this 2019.
O God of Great Power, hear my request and help
Open the way for each of us so that we may continue to
Honor the NTRW for years to come.

[[insert your specific petition(s) here]]

O Lord of Ma’at,
I place myself behind you
On each and every day of this 2019
As you place yourself behind me
On each and every day of this 2019.

Oh beneficent NTR
May the path be open so that ma’at thrives for us
for the rest of 2019.

Reversionn of offerings:

O Lord of the Sacred Lands, your enemies withdraw from you.
Heru has turned himself to his Eye in its name of Reversion-of-Offerings.
These your divine offerings revert;
They revert to your servant for life, stability, health and joy.
So that you may flourish for eternity.


And if you want something else to do next week, check out Sat’s Ptah festival rubrics and schedule over here.

 
9 Comments

Posted by on January 19, 2019 in Kemeticism, Year of Rites

 

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Propitiation of Sekhmet Rubric

Here is the first rubric for this year’s propitiations. For January, I’ll be focusing on Sekhmet. This rite is written with the possibility of dancing for Sekhmet, or potentially playing music for Sekhmet. While I don’t think it’s necessary to do so, I have left room in the verbiage to accommodate it, since it seems to have been a big “thing” in antiquity with propitiation rites. Feel free to dance or not dance as you see fit.


Approaching the Shrine:

Come. Rise. Come to me in peace.
Come to me so that I may make Jubilation at twilight for you
with music in the evening.
Exalted is your power, O burning One, O Sated One,
O Mighty One, Powerful, Skillful of Flames,
Lady of the Sky, Mistress of the Two Lands,
O Eye of Horus, and his guide,
Lady of Eternity, Fiery One,
O Red One, whose Flame burns,
Divine Protectress, who guides the people,
O Lady of Fire, O Searing One,
O Devourer, O Scorching One,
May you awake in peace.

The beauty of your face glitters when you rise. O come in peace.
One is drunk at your beautiful face, O Sekhmet, come in peace.
O Sekhmet, you are exalted
in the hair of Ra, in the hair of Ra.
Do not repulse me upon your path, O Sekhmet.
My feet are not impeded, I am not turned back from the god’s place.
I have looked upon your Beauty, O Sekhmet. I have come to you,
and you two uraei have enclosed me.
I have entered this place with ma’at in my heart
In order that I may sate your thirst and ease you into a state of Greenness.
Great is your majesty when you are propitiated.
Everything that you see is yours, so long as Ra crosses the sky.
Everything that you see is yours, so long as Geb takes root in the earth.
There is no god who does what you dislike when you appear in peace and glory.

*Step forward, or open the shrine, depending on your setup*

I open your temple. I come to you.
Your warmth and beauty surrounds me as I enter. I am not repulsed.
Behold, I have come to you to offer Ma’at,
to make beautiful jubilation for my goddess.

Presentation of Light:

*Turn on light or light candle, etc.*

May you awake in Beauty, O Glorious Eye of Heru.
Be strong and renew your youth in peace.
You shine like Ra on the double horizon.
Your word is ma’at, by reason of your Eye, whole and pure.
The Eye of Horus destroys all of the enemies of the
Two Lands in all of their places.
Nothing is hidden from the fiery sight
Of the Eye of Horus, Glorious and Complete.

Purification of offering space:

*Take up water bowl/pitcher*

O water, may you remove all evil,
I give you essential water, O Sekhmet, a tide in your time.
I bring the flood waters to purify your sanctuary.
I bring you the flood waters to purify your temple
and your statue in your place.

*wet your finger and touch the four sides of your shrine, offering table or plate, etc.*

O Sekhmet, your altar is cleansed by the water;
Your altar is purified by the incense;
You are cleansed by Horus;
You are purified by Thoth.
Water invigorates your body;
It is I, your servant,
who comes to you in the palace where you reside.

Presentation of Libations:

Greetings to you, primordial water
Greetings to you, O river
Greetings to you, Great Flood,
You, the father of the gods.

*Pour the libation into a cup or bowl*

This libation is for you, O Glittering One.
This libation is for you, O Sekhmet, come drink it.
I give you this daily joy; It drives away the evil in your heart.
I give you drunkenness without unpleasantness; It gives brilliance to your ka.
I have brought you this Eye of Horus and placed it at your feet.
I present to you that which flows from you
So that you may renew your youth in peace.

Presentation of Offerings:

I come near you, O Sekhmet,
the uraeus of Ra, the protector of all gods.
Cattle and geese are slaughtered for you,
the pieces of your enemies are on the flame.
You inhale their aroma. The haunches dissipate your violence.
Take the pieces of your enemies who are on the flame;
The entire retinue of the NTRW rejoices over their fat.
Take the food and provisions for your subsistence.
Your altars are piled high with offerings of all sorts and forms.
Every follower, every servant, every devotee has come
To bring you the bounty of their hearts.

*place offerings on shrine/altar*

I am Hathor, the Lady of Nourishment;
Who multiplies the cakes and gives life
to the one who is faithful to her.
I have brought you nourishment
so that you may Thrive.
For as you Live, I Live.

O Sekhmet, turn yourself about and see
me, your servant, this sun, this Lord of Light
See me as my body speaks out to you, O Lady of Fire
As my lips repeat pure Ihy-music for you, O Lady of Eternity.
May your merciful face be towards me
As you see the dancing, O Eye of Ra
As you see the skipping, O Devourer.
Turn about and see that there is no darkness in my chest.
O Glorious Sekhmet, let the music into your heart
So that your face becomes green. As green as a living reed.

O Good Eye who gives Life to the Two Lands
Contentment be what is gotten for you
O Lady of the Bread Offerings
contentment be what you see,
O Lady whose joy is in her papyrus-wand
contentment be what you hear,
O Beautiful Sekhmet on her mountain
contentment be before you,
O Powerful Goddess who presides over the desert
contentment be behind you,
O Heart of Ptah
contentment be your lot.

Offering Ma’at:

Ma’at comes to you, in all of her radiance.
Your heart is glad when she appears before you.
Ma’at has come so that she may be with you.
Ma’at is in every place that is yours,
So that you may rest upon her.
Ma’at has taken her position within your shrine.
Thoth, the One who is Great of Magic, makes protection for you
And overthrows your enemies.
Ma’at is established throughout your Domain, truly twice established.
May your contentment with her wash over you.
She resides in your heart for eternity.

Reversion of Offerings:

O NTRW, your enemies withdraw from you.
Heru has turned himself to his Eye in its name of
Reversion-of-Offerings.
These your divine offerings revert;
They revert to your servants for life, stability, health and joy.
So that you may flourish for eternity.

 
7 Comments

Posted by on January 15, 2019 in Kemeticism, Year of Rites

 

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Monthly Ma’at: January 2019 Rubric

Here is the rubric for January’s Monthly Ma’at ritual for anyone who is interested!

Approaching the Shrine

Awake in peace, great gods, awake in peace.
I come to you, your servant, your son, I come to you.
Your beautiful scent, it calls me forward.
And upon you filling my nostrils
I, your servant, your son, I come to you.
I have made my way and I enter into your presence.
I am one of you.
Do not repulse me on the god’s path.
My feet are not impeded, I am not turned back from the god’s place.
I have looked upon the NTRW. I have come to them,
and their two uraei have enclosed me.
I have entered this place with ma’at in my heart
In order that you may create peace with
beautiful ma’at upon this day.

*Step forward, or open the shrine, depending on your setup*

I open your temple. I come to you.
Your warmth and beauty surrounds me as I enter. I am not repulsed.
Behold, I have come to you to offer Ma’at,
to make sound the Eye for its lord.

Presentation of Light to the gods:

*Turn on light or light candle, etc.*

May you awake in Beauty, O Glorious Eye of Heru.
Be strong and renew your youth in peace.
You shine like Ra on the double horizon.
Your word is ma’at, by reason of your Eye, whole and pure.
The Eye of Horus destroys all of the enemies of the
Two Lands in all of their places.
Nothing is hidden from the fiery sight
Of the Eye of Horus, Glorious and Complete.

Purification of offering space for the gods:

*Take up water bowl/pitcher*

O water, may you remove all evil,
I give you essential water, great gods, a tide in your time.
I bring the flood waters to purify your sanctuary, great gods.
I bring you the flood waters to purify your temple
and your statue in your place.

*wet your finger and touch the four sides of your shrine, offering table or plate, etc.*

O NTRW, your altar is cleansed by the water;
Your altar is purified by the incense;
You are cleansed by Horus;
You are purified by Thoth.
Water invigorates your body;
It is I, your servant,
who comes to you in the palace where you reside.

Presentation of Libations to the Gods:

Greetings to you, primordial water
Greetings to you, O river
Greetings to you, Great Flood,
You, the father of the gods.

*Pour the water into a cup or bowl*

I present to you, Great NTRW
the cup filled with primordial water;
Which has come from the Two Caverns.
I pour the libation to water your face;
May your thirst be quenched.

Presentation of Offerings to the Gods:

I come near you, O venerable gods.
I bring the food and provisions for your subsistence.
Your altars are piled high with offerings of all sorts and forms.
Every follower, every servant, every devotee has come
To bring you the bounty of their hearts.

*place offerings on shrine/altar*

I am Hathor, the Lady of Nourishment;
Who multiplies the cakes and gives life
to the one who is faithful to her.
I have brought you nourishment
so that you may Thrive.
For as you Live, I Live.

May your hearts rejoice, O Lords of Eternity
Glorious and excellent NTRW
Behold, I have come from the land of the living
to be with you in this sacred place.
I am one of you. My hatred is evil.
I have come on the good path of the upright
In order to make whole all of our limbs
So that we may live Glorious and Complete as the Eye.
For as you live, I live. And as I live; you live.

Homage to you NTRW who are Established upon Your Seats.
I have placed myself on the floor in awe of you.
I embrace the earth before you.
I have come to you as Thoth, and my two hands are joined under ma’at.

Ma’at comes to you, in all of her radiance.
Your heart is glad when she appears before you.
Ma’at has come so that she may be with you.
Ma’at is in every place that is yours,
So that you may rest upon her.
The radiant one coming forth from the head of the one who created her
She comes to you.
You live off of her. You renew your youth when you see her.
Ma’at rests upon your head. She is seated on your brow.
Your right eye is ma’at. Your left eye is ma’at.
Your mouth speaks ma’at. Your limbs do ma’at.
She takes her seat within your ib.
You are rejuvenated at her sight.

O You who Who keeps the land alive through the activity of your arms
I know you. I know your name.
You open the noses of the living.
You keep the gods alive.
O Mistress of Protection, who protects the gods.
I offer gifts to you, for I know your worth.

The NTRW have peace and flourish through you, O Great Ma’at.
Their hearts live when you rise before them.
Rise O Mistress of Ma’at.
Exist so that the gods may exist in peace and harmony.
Take up position within every shrine of every NTR in every place of Your Domain.
Satisfy the hearts of the Ennead and unite with the NTRW
In all of your beauty.

I am Thoth and I present ma’at to you Great Gods.
My hands are upon her beauty before your face.
You exist because ma’at exists
Ma’at exists because you exist.
Ma’at has made her way upon your brow and into your heart,
And she exists before you forever.

Ma’at has taken her position within your shrine.
Thoth, the One who is Great of Magic, makes protection for you
And overthrows your enemies.
Ma’at is established throughout your Domain, truly twice established.
She is yours forever and ever, O Beneficent Gods.
And as she is yours, she is the people’s.
For as you live through her, your people live through her.
For ever and ever, a million times effective.

Revert your offerings:

O Great NTRW, your enemies withdraw from you.
Heru has turned himself to his Eye in its name of Reversion-of-Offerings.
These your divine offerings revert;
They revert to your servant for life, stability, health and joy.
So that you may flourish for eternity.

 
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Posted by on January 4, 2019 in Kemeticism, Making Ma'at, Year of Rites

 

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New Years 2019

The day dawned cold and wet this new years. I got up before the sun was even up and tried to get everything together for the rites that I wanted to conduct. I had made an attempt to prep everything the night before, but it never fails that the details slip through the cracks for me anymore. Being in the center of 3 other people whose needs and schedules can change quickly, and being a disabled person whose body tends to have its own plans on any given day, it became pretty clear to me before I had even uttered the first word of my ritual that I shouldn’t expect any of the plans that I make for my Year of Rites to be too rigid or concrete, otherwise I would be running headlong into disaster and disappointment.

The first portion of the rite went with minimal issues, and if I could sum it up succinctly, it’d be “I said some words into a cabinet.” Both portions of the ritual I did could be summed up the same way. There is no amazing woo to tell anyone about because, honestly, nothing happened. At all. In that department.

Over the weeks that led up to this, I kept being told that this year was not about Set and Osiris. That it was about the entire pantheon, all of the NTRW, and so I decided to reconfigure the shrine for this year to reflect that. Set and O are sitting around among my other tchotchkes and I opted to make a flat image to use as an icon for this year.

 

I wanted the background to hearken to the Nun, a place that I often see as a place for both death and rebirth. I chose to make the symbols in red and then layer over them with gold and blue. The redness reminding me of the vitality and vibrancy that is within our gods, regardless of how hidden it might become. And I chose to put them on a symbol for gold (nebu) for reasons that I don’t really understand except that it felt Right so I did it.

While I originally had planned on doing the execration during the day and following up with part two in the afternoon, that schedule I mentioned shifted and I ended up doing the execration in the evening, as the sun set. As such, the second rite and subsequent offerings didn’t happen until well after the sun had set.

 

I was partway through my ritual when I remembered that I hadn’t finished my New Years Cloth offering… and so I had to make that while I left the gods to eat their offerings.

I opted to use gold marker and I chose symbols that appeared on the illustration in the book, as well as symbols that I felt would be beneficial for the NTRW in the upcoming year.

And of course, there are the four oranges.

 

Reflections:

One thing that I really noticed during this ritual was that I really am not as pensive or uptight about rituals as I used to be. While I was slightly “ugh” over the fact that certain details got missed, or that I hadn’t finished my offerings before the ritual had been started, etc. — overall, I was just as content and ready to roll with the punches and let the gods deal with it. I wasn’t as concerned with achieving a certain vibe as I had been in the past, and the total mundanity (is that a word??) of it all was quite comforting for me in a way that I didn’t entirely expect. This setup was more formal than what I’ve done in the past, and I think that additional structure helps, but overall it felt less like being under pressure to be perfect and Pious and more like “this is just a thing that I do.”

I also found myself really mulling over the fact that Zep Tepis aren’t always perfect or easily seen. I wanted to be able to time my rites with the sunrise, to allow the sun to really drive home that things were starting anew, but then the clouds covered the sun until about 9am. But when its all said and done, does it really matter? Do I really need the symbolic Zep Tepi to know that I’ve started?

It’s a lot like how most people approach New Years in general. Everyone waits for this symbolic restart, this symbolic date to decide to change themselves. And yet despite waiting for this symbolic date, most of us don’t actually see our changes through to the end of January. I wrote a long time ago about how your Zep Tepi could begin at any time, any place. That waiting for Jan 1 was not necessary, and in some cases, completely unhelpful because of the pressure it puts on you to be perfect straight out the gate.

That the best Zep Tepis pass unnoticed in the very moment when we decide to start working towards something better. That change is not one singular Big Event that causes us to change everything about ourselves. That change is made in tiny, seemingly insignificant choices that can build up to Big Events later on. That the best changes happen incrementally, not overnight when the calendar resets and the year changes.

While I was waiting for some sort of sign that symbolically signaled the changes we’re all undergoing, it became very easy to miss the very real fact that my Zep Tepi happened months ago. This Year of Rites didn’t just magically manifest overnight. I didn’t just wing my ritual. No, this has been in the works since August on some levels, since November on other levels, and since late December for the rest. Just because I didn’t have some awe-inspiring moment in shrine didn’t mean that the work hadn’t been done, or that the work didn’t matter or bear fruit.

Or as I wrote it in my log: Sometimes our Zep Tepi isn’t momentous. Sometimes it passes without notice. Its still important because any time we choose — consciously or not — to improve ourselves, we’re getting closer to ma’at, and that is the point in all of this.

May all of your Zep Tepis in 2019 be amazing — noticed or otherwise.

 
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Posted by on January 2, 2019 in Kemeticism, Year of Rites

 

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New Years 2019 Rubric

I’ve finally finished putting together the rubric for my first rite in the Year of Rites. Since I said I’d post any rubrics I made up here on WP, I’m posting this here for others to reference if they’d like!

For this New Year, I plan on giving offerings around sunrise, since that’s when I make my breakfast. The first ritual will consist of opening the shrine, purifying the shrine with water, pouring libations, giving offerings, and using heka to build the NTRW a brand new body for the year of 2019.

Later in the day I will be performing a red pot execration with a few other people, which I will then give a second round of offerings and recitations at the shrine afterwards to establish ma’at after the execration is done. The second half includes an offering specifically of oranges, because oranges are in season right now, and are highly associated with New Year for this part of the country. Oranges also have a very solar quality to them, which i felt was fitting for a New Years offering. If oranges are not on the docket, I recommend offering something in multiples of four, to keep the Four Pillars association intact.


Approaching the Shrine:

Awake in peace, great gods, awake in peace.
I come to you, your servant, your son, I come to you.
Your beautiful scent, it calls me forward.
And upon you filling my nostrils
I, your servant, your son, I come to you.
I have made my way and I enter into your presence.
I am one of you.
Do not repulse me on the god’s path.
My feet are not impeded, I am not turned back from the court of the great portal
so that I may conduct the divine service,
that I may present offerings to You that made them.

*Step forward, or open the shrine, depending on your setup*

I open your temple on this first birth of the sun of 2019
And as I enter, rage goes forth.
Behold, I have come to you to offer Ma’at,
to make sound the Eye for its lord for this 2019.

Presentation of Light to the gods:

*Turn on light or light candle, etc.*

May you awake in Beauty, O Glorious Eye of Heru.
Be strong and renew your youth in peace.
A new day has dawned, and with it, a new year.
Conceived at night, born every day — a Zep Tepi is at hand.
As the sun rises over the horizon,
Khepri begins his cycle anew,
his eyes see all under the four pillars of the sky.

My eyes are the eyes of Khepri,
Our light shines throughout the land.
My attraction is the attraction of Khepri.
Our attraction shines throughout the land.

Purification of offering space for the gods:

*Take up water bowl/pitcher*

O water, may you remove all evil,
I give you essential water, great gods, a tide in your time.
I bring the flood waters to purify your sanctuary, great gods.
I bring you the flood waters to purify your temple
and your statue in your place.
The primordial water that purifies this Zep Tepi.

*wet your finger and touch the four sides of your shrine, offering table or plate, etc.*

O NTRW, your altar is cleansed by the water;
Your altar is purified by the incense;
You are cleansed by Horus;
You are purified by Thoth.
Water invigorates your body;
It is I, your servant,
who comes to you in the palace
where you reside on this
beautiful New Year’s Day

Presentation of Libations to the Gods:

Greetings to you, primordial water
Greetings to you, O river
Greetings to you, Great Flood,
You, the father of the gods.

*Pour the water into a cup or bowl*

I present to you, Great NTRW
the cup filled with primordial water;
Which has come from the Two Caverns.
I pour the libation to water your face;
May your thirst be quenched.

Presentation of Offerings to the Gods:

I come near you, O venerable gods.
I bring the food and provisions for your subsistence.
Your altars are piled high with offerings of all sorts and forms.
Every follower, every servant, every devotee has come
To bring you the bounty of the land
On the first Zep Tepi of this 2019.

*place offerings on shrine/altar*

I am Hathor, the Lady of Nourishment;
Who multiplies the cakes and gives life
to the one who is faithful to her.
I have brought you nourishment
so that you may Thrive in 2019.
For as you Live, I Live.

As this year is Renewed, so too is your body.
See me as I give you your eyes, installed in their proper place.
I make sure our Light shines bright,
So that you see things hidden in the dark.
Our eyes see all, nothing is hidden from us in our domain
On this morning of this Zep Tepi.

I give you your mouth in order to eat,
Your throat to carry out its work.
I make your voices victorious to the divine tribunal
in the audience chamber,
I lessen the voices of your enemies.

I give you a brave heart to drive away enemies.
A heart guided by ma’at, living off ma’at.
I strengthen your arms
so that you can strike down your enemies.
I give you your regalia,
so that you may have Authority.

As your body forms anew;
You are imbued with Life and Stability;
Glorious and Complete.

Oh NTRW, turn yourself about and see
this servant, this sun, this Lord of Light.
May your merciful face be towards me throughout 2019.
May your face be green throughout 2019.
As your face is green, so too shall mine be green.
As green as a living reed.

I place myself behind you
On each and every day of this 2019
As you place yourself behind me
On each and every day of this 2019.

Oh beneficent NTRW
May ma’at thrive for us
in this upcoming 2019.

Reversion of Offerings:

O NTRW, your enemies withdraw from you.
Heru has turned himself to his Eye in its name of
Reversion-of-Offerings.
These your divine offerings revert;
They revert to your servants for life, stability, health and joy.
So that you may flourish for eternity.


Part 2

Approaching the Shrine:

O Great NTRW,
Turn your face to me, your servant,
and see what I have done for you.

I have taken the mace that brings out your prestige,
your heart is glad to see it.
I have done what I said I would,
I have driven back the rebels.
Those who commit evil have been
delivered to the block.

Presentation of Offerings to the Gods:

The slaughterhouse of the NTRW is full.
I have acted on behalf of my lord,
Lord of the Slaughter, who-sits-upon-his-oil-barque,
To provide you with the hearts of your enemies.

*place offerings on shrine/altar*

Their bones are beneath your feet.
Their voices are silences.
Their names are unknown.
They do not exist.

I have removed falsehood in your time,
Ma’at triumphs in your space.
I have delivered to you the Four Pillars of your Domain.

*place four oranges on the offering plate*

May the NTRW be satisfied with what I have done.
I have brought Order out of Chaos.
I have made your Domain flourish like Zep Tepi
through the precepts of ma’at.
I have established you within your Domain.
I raise the sky for you,
the horizon is high,
the sky is firm on its four pillars.

I offer you this fabric, a pledge to receive a happy new year.
I open the months of the year, its days and its hours.
I make your house for you, under the sky and its four pillars.

Enter. Take your place in this New Year.
Your seat is firm, established for eternity.

Reverting the Offerings:

O NTRW, your enemies withdraw from you.
Heru has turned himself to his Eye in its name of
Reversion-of-Offerings.
These your divine offerings revert;
They revert to your servants for life, stability, health and joy.
So that you may flourish for eternity.

 
6 Comments

Posted by on December 31, 2018 in Kemeticism, Year of Rites

 

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