Tag Archives: holidays

Let Them Eat Cake

As most Kemetics know, Wep Ronpet is coming up at the end of the month (for most of us). And while we have quite a few activities for Wep Ronpet itself, there isn’t a whole lot of discussion about what you can do during the intercalary days. I was thinking earlier this year about what I could do for the 5 birthdays that lead up to the grand finale that is Wep Ronpet, and I realized that I could easily pull something from my own culture and merge it with this holiday: birthday cake.

imagine giving this to Set

Yep, you read that right- birthday cake (or birthday cupcakes).

I don’t know how the practice started, but in the US, a birthday isn’t really a birthday without a cake involved, and I feel like it could easily make sense within a Kemetic structure, too.

First off is the cake. The making of cake could easily fall into a rite for Aset, who seems to have a thing for people baking for her. Mixing the ingredients together to make a nice balanced texture and flavor is an awful lot like doing magix and contemplating ma’at in my mind. Both of these elements can easily be entwined in the preparation of the cake that you wish to give the gods. And while I can’t attest that cakes were specifically offered in antiquity, bread items were quite the staple- and there is the likely possibility that sweet breads were offered, too.

Then you’ve got the frosting. The frosting is a good place to utilize symbolism both in color and in decoration. You could easily use colors that are tied to each NTR whose birthday you are celebrating. Greens and blacks for Osiris, blues and golds for Heru-Wer, reds and purples (UPG) for Set, golds and reds for Aset and blacks and blues (UPG) for Nebhet. And each deity does have symbols associated with them: djed pillars, eye symbols, gold/nebu symbols, etc. You can easily use frosting to make each cake tailored to the specific deity, and to lace the entire edible in heka.

And finally there is the candle. Who doesn’t love candles? They come in so many shapes and colors and styles. Plus, there is the added bonus of fire.

Fire plays a heavy role within Kemetic ritual. To quote Reidy:

As the striking of a fire pushes back the darkness, so the living deity manifesting as the solar Eye of Heru dispels and defeats the enemies of life and light. Next to sunlight itself a first ignited by a human being is the universal emblem of light dispelling the dangers of the dark. In ancient Egypt ritual we see that this simple action – and every ritual action without exception – repeat anew on the earthly plane divine acts that occur again and again on the spiritual and mythic planes. (Eternal Egypt, pg 6-7)

Wilkinson also discusses the importance of fire:

Fire appears to have a life of its own, it may represent life itself- as when the Egyptian king kindled a new flame in his sed or jubliee festival. Living fire was embodied in the sun and in its emblem the “fire-spitting” uraeus. … fire was also a natural symbol of protection. The hieroglyph appears in protective contexts, and apotropaic deities such as Taweret … may be shown bearing torches to repel evil. (Reading Egyptian Art, pg 161)


the gods /are/ pretty old, after all.

So lighting a fire on top of your cake is a good way to invoke protection and life into the upcoming new year, and possibly to serve as protection during the epagomenal days, which are said to be filled with chaos and are unpredictable in nature.

You could even add another layer of meaning into this by including the typical “Happy Birthday” song that most birthdays entail. Singing and music were a large part of Egyptian ritual, as both were said to placate and appease the gods. And almost every ritual included some amount of sistrum shaking and music making. So don’t be afraid to experiment with including these items into your Wep Ronpet plans and celebrations.

There is a symbol called “sema” that represents the trachea and the lungs. According to Wilkinson, this symbol represents union and unity, and is often related to uniting the Two Lands. When you blow out your candles and sing Happy Birthday to the gods, you’re utilizing your breath, your life force to celebrate the gods, to celebrate their existence. You bring yourself closer to them, and them closer to you. Through your actions and your breath you are creating a union between the Seen and Unseen. You are bridging the gap that exists between the two planes and bringing both closer together.

And that’s probably the best birthday gift you could ask for.

Relevant Posts:



Posted by on July 16, 2014 in Kemeticism


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Modern Mythology: May Day is Dick Day

Disclaimer: As I’m sure you can guess by the title, this post discusses dicks and may not be safe for work or suitable for minors. Please use discretion when reading and linking this post.

Last February when I released my idea about a holiday centered around balls, I was approached by another Kemetic who told me that it wouldn’t be fair to leave the other half of the genitalia out of the fun. So to counter Balls Day, we decided to come up with Dick Day, a modern holiday that occurs on May 1 or May Day.

For those who don’t know much about May Day, it is traditionally a holiday that celebrates Spring time and dancing and merry making and features a gigantic dick pole dance. You know the one:

And while Kemetics may not have a local flag pole to deck out with ribbons in honor of our dick flaunting gods and religion, we can still certainly celebrate within our own home in our own way.

Why are Kemetics so into dicks, anyways?

If it’s something that Kemetics seem to be known for, it’s our fixation with dicks, balls, and boobs, and for good reason! Dicks played a rather large role in symbolism in Egyptian antiquity. Dicks were not just symbols of fertility and growth, they were elements of power and strength. Egyptian thought believed that the very spark of creation lay in semen, which is spat out by dicks. Therefore, dicks were tied back to creation, possibly even more so than a woman’s uterus. Without the spark of creation that comes from the semen (and the dick), there would be nothing for the womb to house. The virility of a man was in his ability to wield his dick about, and he who used his dick the most was king of the mountain. For more subtle symbolism, the shrine bolt that closed up many a kar shrine was actually a representation of Set’s dick- therefore, dicks could also protect. They were also bundled up and buried as votive offerings underneath certain temples.

And for those whose power we wanted to remove- so too were the dicks (and hands!) removed.That way, the dead couldn’t utilize their hands in the way that Atum did during Zep Tepi and masturbate their way to rebirth.

So dicks are important. How do we celebrate Dick Day?

There are many ways that you can celebrate Dick Day, but here are a few suggestions to get the ideas flowing:

Harness your creative spark.

Work on projects that you wish to see born or explore your creative side. Maybe use the day for crafting. Start new projects or develop new ideas that you’ve had. You could also do creative projects for your deities as well. You can also perform heka to help promote your creative spark and endeavors. As an example, you could buy seed paper, cut it into the shape of a dick, write your desires on it, and plant it. As it grows, so too will the creativity or creative endeavor that you seek.

Or you could just get creative in the bedroom.

Celebrate your handling of the dicks in your life.

Let’s face it, we all have to deal with dicks in our lives. You know, people who are jerks to you, people who send anon hate, people who are rude to everyone they meet. Those types. For Dick Day, you can always reward yourself for dealing with the dicks in your life. Take some time to perform some self-care and kick your feet up. Eat some dicks to celebrate.


Execrate some dicks.

You ever had that one person who is being a dick who just won’t stop? Well this is the day to handle that person. Execration is a great way to get the nasties out of your life, and you can definitely use Dick Day to give your execrations an extra punch. If you wish to perform your execrations in true Dick Day fashion, cut a piece of paper into a dick shape, write the name of the person who is being a dick onto the paper dick, and then proceed to pierce the dick, rip the dick up into pieces and set it on fire before flushing the ashes.

As you can see there are many ways to celebrate the good dicks in our lives and get rid of the bad dicks in our lives. Consider doing a little bit of both for this upcoming May Day! If you happen to celebrate Dick Day or try and of this stuff out, please let me know!

See how others celebrated (nsfw)!

Other Modern Mythology Posts:


Posted by on April 28, 2014 in Kemeticism


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Making a Religious Calendar Around Food

On New Years eve of 2014, someone asked me what a good offering to the Kami would be. I responded that the typical New Years fare was mochi, a type of rice cake that the Japanese make. If there is something to be noted about the Japanese calendar, its that every season and every holiday has it’s own motif and dish. They have fully integrated their menu into their calendar.

I mulled over this concept for a while, and found myself thinking that the US sucks because we don’t have that sort of thing- a food calendar that mirrors our holidays. But then I realized that we sort of do- you’ve got champagne for New Years. Chocolate for Valentines Day. Beer for St. Patricks. Grilled foods for July 4th. Turkey, stuffing and cranberries for Thanksgiving. Technically, our whole calendar has food laced into it as well. The food may not be seasonal, and we may not entirely understand why that particular food item is a part of our calendar, but it is a cultural thing none the less.

So I began to wonder- could we do such a thing with our religious calendars?

Food called “Krompirusa” by ErminCelicovick via Flickr

Food and calendars could definitely be taken a couple of different ways, and I expect that if we were to create a food based calendar, that each person’s would be slightly different. For example, Kemetics may be able to agree on ball shaped items for Balls Day, but I imagine there would be regional differences for other holidays depending on what is available locally and what is in season. Whether you choose to let the holiday itself dictate the food, or the seasons that the holiday falls in would be up to each individual practitioner. And possibly the best results would come from a mix of both in each holiday/rite.

For some examples that I might consider using, I personally could see oranges for being good for any type of winter holidays that have solar or rebirth connotations because oranges are harvested in the winter in Arizona and they remind me of the solar disc. Sonoran styled Mexican food is a big thing down here, so that ends up being a part of almost all of my larger celebrations, regardless of what is going on. Anytime I do anything for Set, there are dark chocolate cupcakes involved because those seem to be his favorite. I could see eggs being useful for Wep Ronpet, as they can represent rebirth and new growth. I could also see birthday cake being used for Wep Ronpet because it is a grouping of birthdays after all. Additionally, there is already a type of food tradition with Wep Ronpet that involves snake cakes.

If you wanted to do rites or rituals that involve your heart (perhaps another layer to Valentine’s Day?), you could include clusters of grapes or grape-laced food items for their symbolism tied to the heart. For Feast of the Beautiful Valley, an akhu veneration holiday, you could choose food items that are considered family traditions. The Mysteries used to involve corn mummies, so corn or maybe tamales (which are wrapped in corn husks) could be an easy food choice for modern celebrations as well. And I personally think that baking is a good choice for Unification holidays, because you’re taking a bunch of separate ingredients and mixing them together into something new, something whole. Perhaps for holidays centered around battles or war deities, we could prepare food on skewers or kababs. Or for holidays tied to smiting your enemies, you could have mashed potatoes because you effectively “smashing” your enemies.

Whether you choose to let the holiday determine what food you use, or let the time of the year and seasonality of the dishes you’re eating determine what you make for a holiday, I recommend experimenting with marrying the two. A lot of our life events and holidays do incorporate the sense of taste into the experience, which can create a stronger bond and perhaps a better experience. Plus, if you can create strong ties between religious celebrations and food, you can almost evoke the sense of that celebration anytime you eat that particular dish as a means of bringing religion into your day to day life.

There are lots of possibilities to discover and experiment with when it comes to food. Perhaps the next time you need a reason to celebrate, you can choose a dish that is worth celebrating around and building from there!

Relevant Posts:


Posted by on March 28, 2014 in Kemeticism, Rambles


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Modern Mythology: I <3 Balls Day

Gather around the camp fire once again as we delve into the myths and stories of our religion!


During the ongoing battle for the Kingship of Egypt, Set and Horus found themselves in a large predicament. You see, each deity had been damaged from this battle – one losing his eye, and the other his testicles. It’s very painful to lose your testicles, you know! Through a series of wiley tricks and maneuvers, however, both were able to get their missing pieces restored to their former glory.

What Set didn’t know at the time, however, is that Thoth – “Astute in His Plans Who Fashioned All Things, Including Set’s Nuts” – gave him an even better set of balls as a way of saying thank you for taking the bad rap for the whole “felling Osiris” thing. When Set received his new shiny set of testicles, he was amazed at their awesomeness. It was like having a disco in his pants.

He was so ecstatic about his new hardware that Set ran to the highest point of Egypt and yelled out across the land “These are the best balls ever! Look at how amazing they are! I will surely be able to use them to smite apep every day!” Everyone was so happy for his new shiny testicles that a festival was proclaimed in their honor. And in our modern calendar, that day is February 14th- the day of <3-ing Your Balls.

You can see the effects of this festival almost everywhere you look! There are stands of balls in grocery stores. Ball shaped candies and candy containers. Ball shaped jewelry. Ball shaped everything! All as glorious and magnificent as Set’s newborn testicles.

When celebrating this holiday, it is customary to deck out your shrine is as many ball-shaped items as possible. Set loves the color red, so the redder, the better. However, he does has a soft side and can appreciate balls of other colors. Be sure to spend some time reflecting on your own personal badassery and taking the time to remember just how great you really are. You can also use this time to ask Set and Thoth in assistance in making your own balls better- as a means of seizing your potential and making tough choices that require balls to make!

With the proper heka, Thoth can assist you in creating a disco in your pants, too!


Every year around February we see nearly every grocery store in America fill up with tons of pink and red Valentine’s Day stuff. Usually, this is a holiday I don’t participate in at all. I’ve never cared for the concept behind it, and I’ve just never really gotten into the habit of doing anything for V-Day.

However, my foray into Kemeticism has changed my perspective on this holiday. Set’s main symbol is his balls. For most of us, we take a standard heart and turn it upside down to make it into a set of balls (which may not be too far off of what the heart used to mean). So now the second half of January and the first half of February is nothing but balls for me. It’s turned from a holiday about romance into a holiday about Set.

And his balls.

I feel like this can be shifted into a modern festival or rite that we can use within our community for seizing the day, taking hold of our courage and reminding ourselves of our greatness (in the same way that Set reminds me of his greatness all the time). If you’d like to give it a shot, there are two methods for this particular heka. One version, which involves a large chocolate heart, can be found here. The second, which involves good old fashions paper, is below:

  • Sheet of paper- 8.5″x11″. Any color will do, I recommend red or purple.
  • Writing utensils of whatever color you’d like.
  • A situation or trait you need to find some courage to tackle.
  • This tutorial about folding.

Start with your paper- figure out what situation you need some courage with. On the inside of your paper, write the situation down. You can be as specific or generalized as you need to be. Feel free to use sigils or different colors for different things. Get as creative as you want.

Then, fold up your paper into the shape of the balls using the tutorial above. If possible, place your balls in a location where you can see them regularly. If your situation is at work, perhaps leave them on your desk. If it is something to do with money, maybe leave it in your wallet. If you’re unsure, leave them on your shrine for the gods to keep an eye on.

Hopefully the heka provided in this post can help you to gain some courage and celebrate your awesomeness this Valentine’s Day! If you have any questions regarding these rites, or try these rites out for yourself- please let me know!

Other Modern Mythology Posts:


Posted by on January 21, 2014 in Kemeticism, Rambles


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KRT: “Other” Holidays

How do we negotiate Western secular and/or popular religious holidays? Do we ignore them? Do we co-opt them? Do we have celebrations with our non-Kemetic friends/family and then hold our own celebrations, if we have any Kemetic festivals around that particular time?

One of the first questions most new Kemetics ask is “what are our holidays, and how do we celebrate them?”, but for this round of the Kemetic Round Table, we decided to tackle another aspect of celebrating holidays as a Kemetic- and that is the situation of handling non-Kemetic holidays in our practices. I live in the USA, so all of my perspective and writing will be dealing with US holidays specifically.

As I had stated in my previous post on holidays, I don’t celebrate much as a Kemetic. I take note of Wep Ronpet and the Mysteries, and that’s about it. So it shouldn’t come as a surprised when I say that I don’t celebrate a lot of Western holidays, either. Most holidays in the US fall into two categories- they are patriotic/country oriented in nature (July 4th, Memorial Day, Labor Day) or they are Christian in nature (Christmas, Easter). Because my family is not very religious, I never did much for the Christian holidays, and due to my lack of patriotism or military ties, I don’t do much for the other category, either. And truth be told, when it comes to most Christian holidays, I don’t even know very much about what the holiday is for.

Most holidays are nothing more than a day where all of the stores are closed and I can’t do anything outside of my house (or I have to work).

The only holidays that I make any effort on are Thanksgiving and sometimes Christmas. This is out of a familial obligation over some desire to celebrate. And many times, I will leave to go to Vegas for Christmas because Christmas doesn’t exist on the Strip. This isn’t necessarily out of a dislike of the holiday itself or the religion that it’s tied to, but instead is a reflection of my discomfort of being around my family. Many times my family hinders my mental health, so I tend to avoid holidays and parties where we have to interact. On the years where my mental health can’t hack it, I don’t partake in the holiday or celebrations.

That being said, you as a Kemetic can take a few routes when handling holidays. You can ignore them entirely, as I do, you can celebrate them secularly- as many Americans do anymore, or you can rework the holiday to be Kemetic-tied.

One of the most popular holidays to re-work into a Kemetic sense is Christmas. There are a few different angles I’ve seen including both Moomas and Dickmas (nsfw). There are also a lot of Egyptian Pagans who like to try and convert the Christmas holiday into a celebration of Horus’ birthday. While it is not historically attested that Horus was born in the winter, I could see it working if you wanted to give a shot. For myself personally, I am usually working through the Mysteries during Christmas, so it’s more about the rebirth and transformation of Osiris than anything else.

I’ve also seen Thanksgiving turned into Herishefgiving in an attempt to bring some attention to the lesser known deity. And you could potentially turn Halloween into an akhu festival.

In short, I do think that Western/modern holidays do give us the opportunity to develop new mythologies and connections within our religion. These modern connections help our religion to grow and flourish in the modern era and can breath new life into the gods. Additionally, bringing a Kemetic flare to a non-Kemetic holiday can help practitioners to survive the holiday season and possibly blend in with non-Kemetic family celebrations- which can be helpful for managing stress load. However, there is no obligation to celebrate or not celebrate as you see fit. When it comes to holidays, feel free to experiment and try new things until you find something that works well for you!

To see other responses to this topic, check out the KRT Master List.


Posted by on December 11, 2013 in Kemetic Round Table, Kemeticism


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KRT: Calendars and Holidays

What about holidays? Do we need them? How do I figure out when holidays occur? How do I celebrate holidays? Can I make up my own holidays?

Sundial by Brian Clayton via Flickr

For this round of KRT, we’re discussing the nuances of having a calendar in your personal practice. There is a lot of discussion about calendars, mainly because Egypt was very peculiar in how their calendar was set up, and unlike ours, where the dates are pretty static, the dates of things drifted because a lot of their holidays were centered around when stars would rise and set and things of that sort.

There is also the issue that there are holidays for almost every day of the year, and in many cases, there are multiple holidays each day because we’re compiling calendars from thousands of years of Egyptian history. And on top of that, we don’t always know how each holiday was celebrated either. Sometimes we only have a name for the holiday in question.

So as you can see, it gets complicated really really quickly.

Unlike a lot of Kemetics, I don’t celebrate many holidays. If anything, I’m more likely to celebrate a Shinto Taisai over a Kemetic holiday – and personally, I think this is okay. I don’t think you necessarily need to adhere to the traditional holidays in order to “properly” participate in the Kemetic religion or worship/work with the NTR.

So why don’t you think the holidays are important or necessary?

I think the answer to this is a multi-layered thing. Holidays are great- they can bring people together. They remind us to be active in our practice and to honor the deity or figure that the holiday is centered around. Holidays have a knack for reminding us that religion is important and that it plays a role in our life. But for many Kemetics, we are doing what priests did by focusing on the gods daily- so I don’t think that that aspect of our religion really needs emphasis for us.

Further more, many of the holidays were centered around agricultural and seasonal things that no longer occur, or don’t occur where we live (many people don’t have planting season in the winter or we no longer have a pharaoh to venerate for certain festivals, for example). And on top of that- how do you really celebrate a holiday that you pretty much know nothing about? If you don’t know anything about the holiday in question- what is the point? Why not make a new, more meaningful holiday instead?

And that is probably more accurate to how I approach the Kemetic calendar. I honor gods and days as I see fit (which is rarely). The only traditional holidays I even remotely bother with keeping to are Wep Ronpet and The Mysteries.

It is in my personal opinion that you can create new holidays if you want. To some extent, even with the old, well established holidays- we are recreating them, breathing new life into something that has been long forgotten. So even though the names are the same, the practices themselves are pretty new – and that is okay. Nothing says that you can’t create new, personal holidays for the gods that celebrate your practice, your life, your progress, or the gods in particular.

Or you can do like me, and not celebrate at all. That’s cool too.

As for figuring out holidays- that is a tricky thing. For established holidays (traditional days of celebration and veneration from antiquity) I utilize KO’s calendar that they send out each month. And in the near future, Tamara Siuda herself will be releasing a book about the calendar that should be helpful with determining dates for the traditional holidays.

What if I want to create some holidays?

That’s a bit more intuitive, I think. I like to spend more time venerating Set in the summer because its dry and dead- and it is more traditionally aimed towards him. Down here in the desert, we do actually have a short growing/planting season in the late fall/early winter- and I spend more time focusing on Osiris during those months. And due to my Shinto influences, when I do participate in Taisai (holidays, basically) I do things for the NTR, too because they are a part of my life.

So if you’re interested in creating your own set of new holidays, I’d recommend you take a look at what you want the holiday to celebrate, and where on the calendar that would fit best. Perhaps you feel like crap during the month of March and need to add a holiday in there to remind yourself to keep going and that life is awesome. Maybe you are forced to do the Christmas thing every December, and need to add some personal, Kemetic touches to the holiday to keep your sanity. Or maybe you feel particularly close to your god in the middle of June and want to find a way to celebrate them during that month.

I think that holiday creation is great, but its highly personal- and so telling someone how to do it is very difficult.

As for methods to celebrate- a lot of my methods follow the same general structure.

  • I clean my house.
  • I clean myself.
  • I do a rite for the gods (usually out of Eternal Egypt) and leave them offerings.
  • I execrate stuff.
  • I try to have a good day and take a rest for once.
  • And then I normally have a good meal to cap it all off.

I would recommend experimenting and finding what works best for you. For things like Wep Ronpet or Feast of the Beautiful Valley, we’ve got some idea as to how things were done in antiquity, but for many holidays, we’re completely stumped as to what was done. So I see nothing wrong with trying out new things. If the gods dislike it, odds are they will let you know.

View the Master List for this topic by visiting here.


Posted by on August 14, 2013 in Kemetic Round Table, Kemeticism


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Building a Mystery

The Mysteries of Asar started this past week and that got me thinking about the nature of the Mysteries and how I was going to attempt to celebrate them this year.

Originally, I wasn’t going to do anything for them, but on Thursday night, I got a huge drive to suddenly set up my… shrine… area? the way that I used to. It became such a strong feeling that I couldn’t ignore it anymore. Since it’s not the traditional format for setting up the shrine, I thought I’d share it here- just in case anyone else wanted to try it themselves.

This idea isn’t originally mine. I got it from my SO, and I have no clue where he got the idea from. When I learned about how he goes about this, I knew nothing about Kemeticism, the Egyptian calendar or it’s holidays. But it felt right at the time, and the more I’ve learned over the years, the more I have felt that it feels right. So more and more, it’s what I do.

When we originally did this- we did it on the last New Moon in February (or if it happened on say, March 1- we’d do it then). We would take up O’s statue and wrap him in a particular blue cloth that we have. We’ve used it on our altar to represent water in the past. And generally speaking, it is O’s cloth. No two ways about it. The night of the New moon, we take this cloth and we wrap O in it. Covering all of his icon up. We then set it on the shrine, leave an offering, spend a few minutes, and leave him there. And he stays there for a month. The next Full moon, we unwrap him, give him a big offering feast, and celebrate. Then things return to normal.

Over the years, I’ve found that little nuances in this ritual just make sense to me. February is the time right before Spring starts. It’s right before things really start to get fertile (in most of the US, anyways). Unlike here in the late Fall- it will take months for things to start to grow. So for us, Feb fit the bill. The New Moon is when the moon is hidden. This is when O disappears from sight. And he stays hidden for quite some time. In some ways, unwrapping him at the Full moon makes sense- but I can understand the full month as well. The cloth also succeeds in hiding him. The blue could easily be water. His drowning. So for me, it makes sense.

So that is what I have done for this year. The other night, as I wrapped him up, tears overcame me- for whatever reason. I let them flow, unsure as to their origin. I thanked him for his sacrifice. And I told myself he would be back soon. For now, Set has been moved away from his statue, and in the future, O will be kept inside my box while Set takes a trip outside of the box. I think in the future, I won’t open that shrine case for the entire month. Leaving the offerings outside, instead. It will be interesting to see what a formal shrine will do to this ritual next year.

That is my current plan. O is currently wrapped up and I look forward to unveiling him in a few weeks time. I will be sure to leave him a nice large offering at that point, to celebrate his return.


If you want a more accurate representation of what happened at the Mysteries. According to my Abydos book, there was often a parade/pilgrimage from Abydos proper to Umm el’Qaab. This was the supposed location of O’s tomb (though it’s likely the tomb of a first dynasty pharaoh). During this procession, there would be agents of Set hiding along the path- trying to ‘stop’ the followers of O from getting to the tomb. I guess they’d fight these people off and work their way to the tomb where they’d perform some type of rite, which isn’t very clear. It’s interesting, though. Everyone want to go pretend beat eachother up in the name of Order overcoming Chaos? XD


Posted by on November 26, 2011 in Kemeticism


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