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Side Effects of Astral Bleed-Through

30 Aug

I don’t know if my experiences are considered “normal”, but I’ve found over the years that it’s really only a matter of time before your astral life starts to bleed over into your day-to-day life. In many ways, I expected it, as you’re essentially immersing yourself into a separate culture, and creating something of a second life that you live. Though I suppose how much this second life effects you will largely depend upon how much time you spend traveling, and how different the world that you fall into Over There is from over here.

For me, the process of bleed-through hasn’t been exactly linear, but it’s definitely occurred. At first it was relatively small things, and they were things that I either expected (such as problems coping with traumatic experiences, or the inevitable learning curve that comes with astral work) or purposefully worked to pull into my life (such as changing my clothing or buying new items that remind me of my family, etc.)

But then it started to get worse, this bleed-through. I started having issues with not saying “oh where I come from, we do this” because I knew that if I did, someone would want to know where exactly it was that I came from, and I wouldn’t have an answer for them. And then I found that my accent from Over There started to show up more and more over here, which I constantly have to battle now. And then it became things like saying words that belong to a language that I don’t even have a name for. As I caught the words in my throat, I anticipated having others ask me “oh what language is that”, and the resulting embarrassment of going “I have no clue :)”. The more bleed-through I began to experience, the less control I had over it.

And then I noticed a lot of my fundamentals began to change.

The more work I did in the astral, the more people I met, the more my ingrained views were challenged and scrutinized. The more experiences I had, the more I was forced to question how things are done here, and whether those methods are truly for the best. I found that we readily accept a lot of things as truths, as being “the only way” of doing something, but when you get far far away from home, you find that there are actually many ways to do things. And sometimes the way you know best isn’t necessarily the best way.

I found that my ideas about ethics for things began to shift and morph as I learned about other places. I found that my distaste for certain things went down in some ways, but went up in others. I found that I became more and more frustrated about the limitations of this planet that we live on. I found that my new methods of approaching things might not make other humans thrilled or happy.

I found that through the act of traveling, parts of myself had begun to change. The me from Over There was really beginning to bleed into the me that is over here, and I was left figuring out how to reconcile the two. Or more accurately, I was left figuring out how to reconcile living in this world with the new knowledge I had gained from traveling.

This opened up an interesting dichotomy for me. On one hand, it’s readily accepted and acknowledged that entities that live Over There might operate differently than humans. I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve seen people mention that gods might behave differently than us because their ethical structures are different than ours. I’ve seen the same said about fae as well. It’s more or less accepted knowledge that entities that don’t live here don’t always behave in ways that we expect or would prefer. And the sentiments that usually accompany this thinking is that we shouldn’t try and change their methodologies just because they’re foreign to us.

But on the other hand, what about the people who consistently work with these beings? How long can we expect practitioners to rub elbows with entities who aren’t from here before they start to act more like the beings that they’re rubbing elbows with? What of the bleed-through that spirit workers will (likely) inevitably experience? How should spirit workers and/or astral travelers be expected to handle such bleed-through? What about situations where a spirit worker’s actions grate against their own morals and ethics (because sometimes you are not in control of yourself when you are traveling), how do they cope with the gap between the two? What are our collective expectations for such situations?

This is especially important because there is a lot of double-bind logic going on within the pagan community. Based off of what I’ve read, a lot of people would tell you that you shouldn’t go into someone else’s culture and try to change it. In that respect, we should respect that the gods do things differently than we do and that we shouldn’t push our human methods onto non-humans. Makes sense and seems respectful, right?

But then on the other hand, if a spirit worker has picked up traits from Over There that belong to that culture, but clash with our more human mentalities–what then? If you’re not supposed to change the astral culture you live in, you’ll be forced to more or less assimilate into the culture in order to get along, fit in, and get work done. But you’re also not allowed to bring it over here because it’s foreign or weird or is considered immoral by humans–what do you do? Currently, the answer seems to be that you shift your mindset from here to There and back again as you travel, but is that causing harm to the spirit worker’s health? Are there better methods to doing this? We won’t ever know unless we can openly discuss such things.

Speaking purely for myself, I have kept most of my bleed-through entirely to myself. I don’t talk about it publicly very much, and I’ve found that I’m able to keep a lot of the shifts and changes I’ve experienced to myself. I’ve learned to split my brain apart even more, to remind myself that “when you’re here, you do X, and when you’re there, you do Y” so as to not make anyone uncomfortable or weirded out. But just like with anything that lives in a closet or compartment, there are always days when it’s harder to keep such things hidden. There are days when I’d like to openly discuss some of the weirdness I’ve picked up along the way, with the hope that maybe I can network with others and learn from them about how they cope with maintaining separate mentalities for here vs. There.

Bleed-through was completely expected, but the way in which it’s manifested has taken me by surprise (at least a little bit). I’d certainly love to hear if other spirit workers have experienced bleed-through or shifts in their life because of what they’ve picked up while traveling or working with spirits. And if you do experience such things, how you cope with them or handle them.

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17 responses to “Side Effects of Astral Bleed-Through

  1. Jules Morrison

    August 30, 2016 at 4:53 pm

    I can’t help but be curious what it would be like if you’d gone the other way on that decision, and said, fuck it, I don’t care if the humans think I’m weird, talking about places that don’t exist, or that my ethical system has become seriously tilted to the alien and I’m picking up the accent and dressing for offworld fashion. To my way of thinking, that would be kinda neat cultural borrowing and blending. You might have started a subculture, heh.

     
    • DevoTTR

      September 7, 2016 at 6:57 pm

      I have done that in some regards, but in some ways it wouldn’t be smart. I can’t wear traditional clothing to work, f’ex, because wearing anything that isn’t Western is generally frowned upon. I do want to start documenting more from over there, and seeing if I can bring more of the traditions from there over here… but that will probably be years in the making.

       
  2. Tom

    September 5, 2016 at 11:16 pm

    You seem to be dealing with the same thing that early ethnographers dealt with. You have embedded yourself within a culture as a participant. As someone who embeds with several cultures, it looks like you need to work on compartmentalization of the separate worlds that you walk in. Added perspective is a helpful thing that I would let move from compartment to compartment, but I would draw the line at that.

     
    • DevoTTR

      September 7, 2016 at 6:55 pm

      Downside is that I already have my mind pretty compartmentalized. Problem is that I really hate living that way, and I feel like on some level, it’s becoming very unhealthy for me :\

       
  3. Elder Mountain Spiritual Artist Residency

    September 16, 2016 at 8:58 pm

    Yes there are many side effects, but one must first understand where they are at. Also all beings on or around earth ancient or just reincarnated are from earth …
    https://eldermountain.wordpress.com/2016/08/28/dreaming-lucid-dreaming-101/

     
    • DevoTTR

      September 26, 2016 at 8:46 am

      …I wasn’t asking /if/ there are side effects. I simply wanted to know if other people had them, or had ideas to cope with them. Second, not all beings are from earth, not all beings attached to earth are originally from earth. Third, the post isn’t really relevant, as I don’t travel while asleep… so I’m not really sure what to respond with? I feel like you were more interested in sharing your post than actually discussing the content of what I have posted.

       
      • Elder Mountain Spiritual Artist Residency

        September 26, 2016 at 9:00 am

        I share it with you because I am a master dreamer and dream walker, its a gift to you, if you see it as selfish then that is your perception and perspective of someone you do not know. So try to suspend judgement …. And to answer your question Yes everyone does have side effects.

        People have come to think that the great mystery of the soul, which is the astral body is for free, that there are no consequences. One could not be more wrong, when you open up the gate of the soul with things like remote viewing, astral travel out of body, you open the gate to your own karma. Under 40 your still safe, around 37 everything you do in your 20s and 30s, will begin to vibrate and wake up the soul monsters of your own past and your own past life.

        I don’t tell people to enjoy it while it lasts because from 40 years of astral travel i don’t play with fire, and i do not recommend playing with fire. So the answer is YES.

         
      • DevoTTR

        September 26, 2016 at 9:11 am

        And again. I was not asking /if/ it was a thing. I know it’s a thing. I’ve experienced it. I was asking for others to open up a dialogue to compare experiences and methods of coping. Which you sorta really have yet to do, except to mention it in a very vague sense to, I imagine, make me feel like I should value your input more because “years of experience”. Or to, idk “benevolently warn me” about the path that I”m on, even though you have virtually no idea who I am, how old I am, or wtf is even going on. You’re making a lot of assumptions, and that’s been my issue with your comments since I first saw them show up in my inbox.

        While yes, sometimes links to resources can be gifts (though just so you’re aware, you probably should wait for someone to /ask/ for resources), but in this case, I don’t really consider it one? It’d be one thing if your link was about your methods to cope or more about how you cope or deal with bleed-through, but it’s a completely unrelated thing that isn’t even relevant to what I’m talking about or asking about in this post.

        Please actually read what I am writing and respond to what I am saying instead of trying to wave your experience in my face as a means dismiss my own experience. Thanks.

         
  4. Elder Mountain Spiritual Artist Residency

    September 26, 2016 at 9:27 am

    I would like to ask you a question by your response you gave… Have you ever worked with a Martial Arts master teacher? or a zen master teacher? Tibetan Bardo? Dream master, Violin master teacher? If so how many years?

     
  5. Elder Mountain Spiritual Artist Residency

    September 26, 2016 at 9:28 am

    and do you do any type of drugs like pot, wine, alcohol, dmt, shamanic drugs?

     
  6. Elder Mountain Spiritual Artist Residency

    September 26, 2016 at 9:29 am

    And how old are you?

     
  7. Sheloya

    September 29, 2016 at 4:08 pm

    What helps me is my Gate Keeper deity, Eshu. It’s like when you prepare to go out or when you return home physically, there’s a doorway to pass through. The balance is kept more easily with the assistance of he who lives in the doors.

    Sometimes I jump into another place and time that has a “meat world”, and parts of the identity I wore who are not pleasant or appropriate may return with me if I didn’t greet Eshu. Just in case, I do this upon going to sleep and waking.

     
  8. Lightning

    September 30, 2016 at 12:47 am

    Yes. I guess for me I just kind of…I’m not articulate right now. Too sleepy but I was lucky enough to have people around me who accept that my mindset from there affects the way I behave and believe here. For me I think the frustration of not being able to deal with things here like I would there is the worst part. Its almost like I’m more of a person from there visiting here than the other way around. I see things here that are wrong and bad and if they occurred there I could do something where as here I’m limited.

     
    • DevoTTR

      October 3, 2016 at 4:14 pm

      I experience that frustration regularly. I’m able to do so much more for people over there than I am over here, and it really bothers me.

       
  9. Muayra

    December 23, 2016 at 8:14 am

    Create a persona especially for traveling to/between other worlds, an ‘avatar’ so to say. Make this persona come alive to you and send this new part of yourself to otherworldly adventures. This prevents the bleed-through as the avatar is only lightly connected to you through your spiritual dimension and not physically.

     
    • DevoTTR

      December 28, 2016 at 12:29 pm

      I haven’t found that that works particularly well for me. It’s not a stable enough connection for certain kinds of work, and in many instances, I ended up with bleed-through that lacked context because I wasn’t experiencing it directly. It may work for others, but doesn’t seem to be particularly effective for me :\

       
  10. Mandie

    January 23, 2017 at 11:48 pm

    My experiences are a bit…odd, because of heavy limitations placed on my spirit. I have noticed that once I was opened to my life ( or, what was ), there, I changed a bit, here, too. Because I’m not culturally immersed in any of the other realms, and of mixed descent, here, it’s easier for me to blend both lives. I do so, everyday. It isn’t without strain or confusion, though.
    It’s not so much a bleed, for me, as it is an awakening to who I always have been. It’s a becoming. It isn’t possible to completely blend two separate…ah, lives(? This isn’t the right word for what I’m trying to communicate ) seamlessly. There’s clashes.
    When I switch from a primarily Caucasian household, to a primarily Asian household, it’s…different. I can’t act in the same manner, for both households. It’s frustrating, and there’s actually not much integration and balance to be had. I can’t run up to my bà and say, “Hey, what’s up!” The way I could with my Irish-American mother. I mean, I could, but I would be perceived as very rude.
    If I’m home with my mom, I can definitely bring parts of my vietnamese culture with me. If I’m with my father’s family, it’s a bit more difficult because our culture is more reserved.
    I suppose, in any life I live, I try to live as truly to myself, as possible, within the confines of whatever situation I’m placed in. I think, that’s all we really can do. It’s difficult, but I love knowing all parts of who I am, and where I come from. Here, and there. Shifting is something I view like…mm…customer service face, family face, friend face- All of us shift, naturally, every single day.
    I am no less of what I am there, here, just confined to a different set of rules and limitations. Whatever cross overs are to be had, I do my best to bring into my ‘here’ life. And, the things I can’t cross over, I write.

    This was an interesting blog post to read! Thank you for it. ♡

     

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